Isaacs Picture Conclusions

Isaacs Picture Conclusions

An Honest Review from an Honest Guy (who doesn't take things too seriously)

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LET’S SNEAK IN TO THE DRIVE – IN # 7: NAKED MASSACRE (1976) TWO PINTOS

July 25, 2012 by theipc

I kind of struggled with how to go about this particular write up since I liked the previous efforts in this Drive – In series and had fun thinking up 70s memorabilia, but I didn’t care too much for Naked Massacre and wanted to come up with something from the 70s that I didn’t like. I don’t really remember Pintos so much (my first car was a ’77 Buick Century {damn you K.C. for ruining my ride!!!!!!}) but I remember […]

Categories: 70s, Drive - In, Grindhouse, I'm Stupid, Slasher • Tags: Boresville, Born For Hell Movie Review, Carole Laure, Christine Boisson, Debra Berger, Drive In, Ely Galleani, Leonora Fani, Mathieu Carrière, Naked Massacre Movie Review, Not Very Exciting, Old Boobs

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DLHI

DON’T LET HIM IN (2011) ONE TOP HAT

June 29, 2012 by theipc

Here’s Part 2 of the big Double Feature today. I would feel terrible if I let anyone get sucked into this shithole for weekend movie night… I was a manager with direct reports for about ten years in this company I work for and it was never fun when we had to fire people. Unlike the restaurant I worked in for ever, where you could fire someone at will and threaten to beat their ass if they didn’t leave right the fuck now, letting […]

Categories: I'm Stupid, Nothing, One Top Hat, Slasher • Tags: Boresville, Don't Let Him In Movie Review, Pretty Sucky, Sam Hazeldine, Sophie Linfield, YAWWWWWWWWWWWNNNN

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DIMPLES2008

DIMPLES (2008) ONE TOP HAT

June 7, 2012 by theipc

Like I’ve said before, I appreciate it when a movie gets made and distributed and I wish everyone well and good fortunes and keep up the good work and all of that, but I have my opinions one way or another and I am sure people don’t like what I do here, but if we get right down to it, this movie bored the shit out of me for an hour and I’m sorry, guys, but I didn’t find anything […]

Categories: I'm Stupid, One Top Hat • Tags: Ashley Peldon, Boresville, Dimples (2008) Movie Review, Gabrielle Carteris, Madeline Zima, Michael McMillian, Not Very Exciting, Randy Spelling, Tasha Taylor, Turrible

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hc

HARD CANDY (2005) TWO TOP HATS

May 14, 2012 by theipc

Have you heard about this movie? The one where Patrick Wilson gets his balls cut off by Juno Ellen Page? Do you remember watching this seven years ago and forgetting how fucking boring this is? Do you remember starting to write about the movies you’ve seen and watched this again because you like what Wilson did in Watchmen and Little Children? Are you astounded that this has an over 7 out of 10 rating on IMDB from 70,000 something people because it […]

Categories: Hostages, Two Top Hats • Tags: Boresville, Ellen Page, Hard Candy Movie Review, Not Very Exciting, Patrick Wilson, YAWWWWWWWWWWWNNNN

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dreamhouse2

DREAM HOUSE (2011) TWO TOP HATS

February 4, 2012 by theipc

For those of you who look at my ramblings, you know that I can get easily suckered hooked by a movie trailer or even the poster and, believe me, that’s what we have here. Here’s a quick back story – last year I watched Robert Redford’s “The Conspirator” and the entire time I was thinking – “This is made by Robert Redford??” It was completely and totally boring and looked and felt like an ’80s made-for-after-school TV show. The Dream […]

Categories: Movie Reviews, Two Top Hats • Tags: Boresville, Daniel Craig, Dream House movie review, Elias Koteas, Isaacs Picture Conclusions, Naomi Watts, Not Very Exciting, Pass, Rachel Weisz

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autumnmovie2

AUTUMN (2009) TWO TOP HATS

January 11, 2012 by theipc

If you’re ever in the mood for an exciting zombie movie – this is not the one. What we have here is an extremely boring, way too long story about a group of people talking and talking and moping and being sad and walking around with their mouths open in very poorly lit rooms, with some zombies here and there. Apparently this is based off of a popular series of novels that I have never read or heard of, but […]

Categories: 80s, Two Top Hats, Zombies • Tags: Autumn Movie Review, Boresville, David Carradine, Isaacs Picture Conclusions, Pretty Stupid, Zombies

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nowhere

NOWHERESVILLE (2011) ONE TOP HAT

December 5, 2011 by theipc

I guess this is one of those movies that gets the one top hat rating but doesn’t go to the Most Unclean list. I guess someone might like this, but I sure didn’t. I realize that it is difficult to make a decent movie where everything takes place in one or two rooms (like this one) but this has to be one of the most boring movies that I have sat through in ages. I dipped into the “Thriller” queue […]

Categories: Movie Reviews, One Top Hat • Tags: Boresville, Movie Review, Nowheresville Movie Review, Sharina Martin; Isaacs Picture Conclusions

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resident22

THE RESIDENT (2011) TWO TOP HATS

November 8, 2011 by theipc

After trolling around the 70′s and 80′s in the Netflix queue (there’s not much else), I found something more modern, the dud that is ”The Resident”. I do remember this being advertised and then released but I don’t remember hearing about this breaking any box office records, and now I see why. Boring from start to finish this really did nothing for me the entire time except make me wonder why the production company thought this would be a good movie […]

Categories: Movie Reviews, Two Top Hats • Tags: Boresville, Hillary Swank, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Movie Review, The Resident Movie

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