Isaacs Picture Conclusions


Now that I have gotten older, I am not likely to take risks like I used to (jumping off a cliff into the ocean, climbing the old, haunted, abandoned water plant smokestack and sitting on the rim drinking beer, going into the  old, haunted, abandoned hospital morgue, etc., etc.) but I have to take a couple of risks this weekend so, if I don’t make it back (lol) I am warning threatening advising early that I am putting out a couple of these things today, just so you’re properly warned. This one isn’t too bad, but it’s kinda boring, but the other one I have in mind for this afternoon really sucked and you need to tread carefully before clicking play on that one. So here’s Part 1 of today’s doubleheader:

Black magic, hairy female armpits, mustaches, blind men, rotary phones and Satan worshiping orgy goers highlight this rather tame Giallo entry. I have to say that I really liked the story and, for that matter, I really liked the camera work, but I found this to be pretty boring most of the way up until the very end. For real, there was about one hour and thirty minutes of ho-humness and then 6 minutes of action. I don’t think this was bad at all, just not very exciting. The premise is inviting, for sure: a dead body turns up and is taken to the morgue but he’s not dead! The events leading up to why he is in such a state are played out in flashbacks while the doctors try and bring him back to life with state of the art machinery! Will they be successful? Will he revive himself out of such a poor state to be in? What will happen to this man? Well – as is typical, we don’t find out until the very last second and ROLL CREDITS!

So Jean Sorel spends about 1/3rd of this movie laying on a slab of metal and staring up at the ceiling. He plays Greg – a U.S. journalist (is everyone a journalist in these things??) on assignment in Prague, Czechoslovakia (now called The Czech Republic) whose body turns up dead (or is he??) on the side of the street, found by an old man sweeping the street with the shittiest broom ever constructed. Along comes a guy with no legs wheeling himself around on a board and one of them alerts the police. Soon his body is in a room (I assume a morgue) and he is stripped naked and put in a body storage cabinet. Shortly before that, though, his brain had started to come alive and is recalling what happened to get him to this point.

Apparently he was having a sexual relationship with a hip, young anti-communist chick played by a young Barbara Bach (hubba hubba) who goes missing much too early. He and his reporter friends, one of which he also sleeps with, hairy pitted Ingrid Thulin (Jessica), having had enough with the local Gestapo type cops,  take the investigation into their own hands. There’s some leads here and some leads there and it turns out she’s not the first girl to go off and disappear but eventually Greg gets a note that leads him to a hoity toity, high priced “club” where the rich go to get their rocks off. Well – or they listen to some symphony. Or do they have a Satan enriched ritualistic old person orgy? I would hate to spoil this for anyone so I won’t blab but there’s a reason all of those girls are going missing.

I think that’s about all I’ve got for this. Nothing really sticks out as too memorable with this one. I thought Sorel did a good job, Bach was hot and the ending wasn’t too bad. I did like the whole girl in the refrigerator scene and I really liked the stunt they did when Greg gets tossed off the bridge but other than that this was a little blah. Better luck to me next time!

A.K.A. “Malastrana”.


  1. Stacy

    You can’t just say you are going to be participating in some sort of “risky” event this weekend and then not tell us what it is!


    • theipc

      HA HA HA!! I thought about it but then I thought everyone would make fun of me… I have to go to an OUTSIDE wedding and reception today and it’s been over 100 all week and by 6 o’clock it’s going to be so steamy and miserable that I am worried that I am not going to make it out of there alive. I’m not young any more and I can’t take the stupid heat!! 😐 Stupid summer!!


      • theipc

        Oh – and I also made a promise to myself to try a “suicide” drink this weekend for the first time in thirty years – I also fear for my health with that…. I am afraid if the pops themselves don’t rot my throat or emulsify my stomach, the sugar alone might do me in!


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