Isaacs Picture Conclusions


(this was written last week or so, after some beers –  I am really just posting this today to see if this works to the new IPC facebook page…) (I am totally FB stupid, but a couple of my friends have these things so I thought why not and gave it a try… )

Nicolas Cage comes to visit us again in this conspiracy theory, mystery, just-who-the-fuck-is-trying-to-kill-me thing set down in N’Orleans, also starring one of the coolest dudes ever, Guy Pearce and Harold Perrineau and Jennifer Carpenter and January Jones. I know Cage has taken his share of dogging lately because of his batshit crazy personal life, but I have always liked him (well, since Raising Arizona) even though he has a tendency to make some shitty movies, I suppose, to pay off all of those taxes he owes. Let me list some of his movies that I like:

Raising Arizona

Red Rock West

Face / Off

Leaving Las Vegas

The Rock (I know, Michael Bay sux but…)

Snake Eyes

Gone in 60 Seconds (I know… I know….)


The Family Man


Lord of War

The Weatherman

The National Treasure movies (I know…)


Drive Angry

To me, those are the pros and here’s some crappy cons:

The Ghost Riders

Season of the Witch (wtf this sucked)

Bangkok Dangerous

Bad Lieutenant (2)

Amos and Andrew

Con Air

Trapped in Paradise


and one of the suckiest movies ever made – The Wicker Man remake.

Based on those numbers, out of the movies of his that I’ve seen, that’s a 16-9 record so he’s still in the win column. My point with that, if you’re asking why I am bothering you with it, is that I thought it was more even – like 12-12 or something and Seeking Justice would tip the scales one way or another and now I’ve typed all of that up and I don’t want to start over so where can I go now? How about – I liked Seeking Justice and it’s not because I just like Cage. I thought it looked real good, Guy Pearce leads a stud team of behind the scenes killers, Cage didn’t act all “Nic Cage-y”, there were some pretty good, creative and original pieces of stunt work and, well, it just wasn’t bad. As always, there’s a good share of unbelievable shit but, it wasn’t The Wicker Man (the bees ohmygod the bees!!!) and it wasn’t too bad for a lazy afternoon when it’s too fucking hot to go outside, stupid summer!

Cage is an English teacher in New Orleans who is patient with the kids who write him notes like FUK U and he’s so sympathetic and kind and boy-he’s-a-good-guy character and he’s married to January Jones who brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkkkk, screeeeeetch, stop. Hey wait – I’ve seen Jones in three things, X-MEN, Saturday Night Live and this… I suppose the thing in casting her is to get horny men in to see if she’ll show her huge boobs (because she sure can’t act) so if you’re looking hoping for that with this, you might get excited with a little side boob action but that’s about it fellas. Sorry. Anyway, Cage is married to Jones and they are friends with Perrineau (a fellow teacher) and the way-underused Jennifer Carpenter shows her face a couple of times. One night, while Cage and Perrineau are playing chess at their Chess Club (see how good and upstanding they are??) when Jones leaves her symphony practice (see???) she is violently attacked and left for dead. (editor’s note – she is not left for dead, she drives herself to the hospital)

Cage heads to the hospital, does some crying (“Will you please let ME be alone with MY WIFE??!??!?!“) (Cage fans might be able to appreciate my attempt at inflection) and goes to rest in the waiting room. As soon as he sits down, smooth talking and buzz-cut Pearce sits behind him and says he is part of a group of people “who can do something about what just happened to his wife….” He knows Cage is seeking justice and they’ll get it for him, he just has to do them a favor later on down the road. (This totally reminds me of a TV show my mom and I used to watch when I was a kid – I think it was called Spencer For Hire where he would exact justice for some wronged innocent… in return for a favor!!! Does anyone remember that? I know I could go look it up but I like to solve problems {like crossword puzzles} without the use of the webs). Initially, Cage, the nicest guy in Louisiana refuses but, when his wife slaps his hand away because she is so scared, he relents and does what Pearce says he needs to do to acknowledge that he wants them to engage and the rapist turns up…. murdered!!! SNAP – that just happened!!

As the story progresses, Cage is eventually asked to do them a favor, and he does, but it’s not enough, until he is eventually asked to go throw a kiddie porn dude off of a bridge. He refuses because he’s such a good mother fucker and Pearce’s group do all sorts of things to “convince him to comply”. As the intrigue unfolds, we don’t know who is working for who and who is putting those notes on his fridge and what?? that guy’s not a kiddie porn dude what?? and this shit is on! Well – this doesn’t really get that! exciting but it’s not too bad at all. Some action, some intrigue, some whaaaaaaaaaaat????s, some good, “real” stunts, some Nic Cage, some Guy Pearce, a side boob and a good natured chess match.  I’ve certainly seen much, much, much, much, much, much, much, much, much worse. “Justice has a price!” = LOL – I’ve had some beers and it’s too hot outside.


  1. I am not familiar with this Nic Cage flick at all! Sounds like an interesting time though. 🙂 Isn’t January Jones on “Mad Men” too? I don’t actually watch that show so I could just be making that one up…


    • theipc

      I’ve actually only ever seen on ep of Mad men but – I do know she’s on it – or she used to be – or something – who knows… not me I suppose!


  2. ahh, this post is music to my ears. i am in a nic cage zone at the moment – as you know, i’m still reeling from watching the weather man, which is one of the best films i’ve seen in a long time. i’ll definitely be checking this one out. seems to just be called “justice” over in the uk. maybe “seeking” is an exclusively american occupation or something. i don’t know. but i like the sound of this. was interested to see you didn’t have “wild at heart” on either the pros or the cons. if you haven’t seen it, i definitely think you should check it out. it’s a crazy lynch film (although easier to follow than most of his weirder stuff – it at least has a fairly straight plot) and cage is awesome in it, channeling some kind of homocidal young elvis presley / bruce lee hybrid, who never goes anywhere without his snakeskin jacket. 🙂


    • theipc

      hey thanks Biffer – I don’t think you’ll be disappointed in this, but don’t expect a miracle : ) @ Wild at Heart I do need to check that out – tomorrow is a holiday here so I’ll be off work and tonight could be a good night for some beer and Netflix queuing! HA!! Thanks again!!


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