Isaacs Picture Conclusions


My (REC)3 hating friend over at HEAD IN A VICE (j/k – inside joke) has subjected nominated THE IPC with THE LIEBSTER AWARD!!! (That’s another fun play on the way he went about his POST – I actually like these things because I think they are fun and we {hopefully} get to learn fun things about other people). I really hope no one takes that the wrong way, I think these things are good fun but, as I admitted one other time, I don’t read that many blogs (and I am ashamed), but just about everyone who I read just got nominated so, if I was sending this back out, it would just be a full loop to people already “on the list”, so to speak. So I am not going to forward this out to You Who Have Already Received This and thank TYSON C for thinking about me, and here I go trying to fill out the questionnaire and (hopefully) instill a couple of yucks in my new, good, bloggy friends. I THANK YOU and THANK YOU and THANK YOU  for ever coming out here and reading my words.

Here’s the rules:

The Rules:
1. Each person must post eleven things about themselves
2. Answer the eleven questions the person giving the award has set for you
3. Create eleven questions for the people you will be giving the award to
4. Choose eleven people to award and send them a link to your post
5. Go to their page and tell them
6. No tag backs

Since I am only going to do one and two at this time – STOP – I might fire this back up in a few months…. WHAT???? Be afraid. Be very afraid.

For now, here’s Rule 1 and Rule 2 in their full, honest (I SWEAR) entirety:

1 ~ When I was a much younger man, my friends and I used to love to get as loaded as possible on beer and then, well, go run around naked in public places. I have retired from that long ago and, for the record, if things have changed, that used to be called “Streaking”. Notable performances include such fine establishments as: Long John Silvers, the grocery store, the gas station, Brian’s street, The Village Inn, the park at the end of Chris’ street, a local bar, a different local bar (twice), Lake Michigan (WHAT!!), Todd’s street, stealing a plant from a local nursery, an automated car wash and probably many more that I am forgetting. The “best crowd ever” had to be the time we got talked into running around an (old) movie theater in just our shoes when the Tim Burton “Batman 2” movie exited on its opening night. I’m talking hundreds of happy viewers.

2 ~ On previous occasions, I have mentioned that I labored away in a restaurant for a number of years before I got a job at the company I’m with now. When I was seventeen or eighteen, we were closing everything down and we all got held up at gunpoint. Think that sounds cool? Think that sounds wicked awesome? It’s really not fun or exciting or anything else with a gun pointed at you. I like to think that – oh yeah – if that happened again “I’d do this and save the day” – but, it’s really, really terrifying and not that fun. I don’t care how bad ass you think you are, that sucks.

3 ~ I am fairly handy with things that don’t involve plumbing and electric. Actually “pretty” handy with stuff like that. For some reason, I have a hard time opening plastic bags. Not plastic things like Target bags – plastic like “chip bags” and Ziplocks. I don’t know…

4 ~ I jumped off a 3 or 4 hundred foot cliff into a California lake. I had “Learning to Fly” by Pink Floyd going through my had (and I was not F-ed up). It was awesome!!! And I broke my tailbone.

5 ~ I gag uncontrollably when I brush my teeth. It’s a miserable, miserable experience.

6 ~ Speaking of bullet five. I believe the secret to not doing that is to breathe through your nose while you scrub your gums. It’s very rare that I can breathe through my nose because I am basically allergic to anything that pollinates and I live in one  of the worst cities in the U.S. for allergies. Well move goddamit you say…

7 ~ I can’t move because I have gotten old and set and I can’t take change without a lot of stress that’s hard on me. Last year I had to get three teeth pulled and that disc in my back finally ruptured and a late summer storm came through and blew our tree over on our house and my job changed dramatically. That was really, really, REALLY hard on me (and that’s actually why I started doing this)

8 ~ In high school, two of my friends and I concocted a dance routine to the song Staying Alive by the Bee Gees. It was rejected for… too many pelvic thrusts.

9 ~ My ten minutes of fame came about ten years later when two of us were at the local bar hangout on a Friday night. It was incredibly crowded and Staying Alive came on the jukebox and for some reason (pitchers of draft beer and Jager shots) we did that routine there by the dart machines and everyone in the bar cheered us on and clapped and bought us rounds. 

10 ~ I read what you write, those of You Who I Follow. I read that you are writing a book or want to write one or are working on one. My friend and I actually wrote one. Six actually. Two trilogies. THE BROTHERS OF THE BRACE and THE BROTHERS OF THE BEARD. Unfortunately they are all hand written and stashed in the upstairs closet. HMMM… Macbook… HMMM… iBook… HMMM… tons of old posts that no one has ever read that I could repost… HMMM… should we take a break here and… HMMM…

11 ~ In my opinion, there is no one more awesome than anyone who takes their time to read this.

So now we have some “personal questions from Head in a Vice:

My questions (there may be a lazy pattern to them) to you lucky/unlucky 11 are:

Would you rather have a pet polar bear or a pet kangaroo?

DUH – Kangaroo

Would you rather be a movie star or be a singer?

Movie Star – in fact, I’d just rather be an extra or the guy who gets killed.

Would you rather eat a dead rat or a live roach?

DUH – Rat

Would you rather be a vampire or a dragon?

I think Vampire. But I wouldn’t be one of those Twilight wusses. I would be a bad-ass like the ones in 30 Days of Night.

Would you rather die in the arms of your one true love or your one true love die in your arms?

I would rather rip my own heart out and eat it before anything happened to my one true love.

Would you rather be buried alive or stabbed to death?

Definitely stabbed. Don’t get any ideas.

Would you rather turn invisible or go through time?

Time travel, all the way.

Would you rather walk through walls or control the weather?

I think I would opt for weather control because it’s so fucking hot here all the time.

Would you rather always be hot or always be cold?

HA! I would control the weather and be neither!

Would you rather be eaten by a shark or a gorilla?

Interesting question. I guess I would choose the gorilla.  Maybe he could ingest part of my soul and move on to greater things.

Would you rather sneeze 1000 times a day or hiccup 1000 times a day?

If you read my bullet about my allergies, I can tell you I already sneeze and blow my nose 1000 times a day so I would choose the hiccups.

Thanks again, Tyson! This was good fun!! I really am going to send this out sometime in the future because I want someone to answer my questions! YOU PEOPLE ARE GREAT!!


  1. 1. I have a story regarding public nudity but am not posting here.
    2. Makes me sad. 😦
    4. Your broken tailbone story is way cooler than mine (I just fell down concrete stairs).
    8. Hahahahaaaaa!!!!!
    10. WE WANT TO SEE THEM!!! (Well, *I* want to see them). Show me yours and I’ll show you mine. 😉


  2. Your most welcome matey 🙂

    Some great detail you put into your answers, some were very sweet and touching but I am slightly sadistic and laughed a lot at your teeth brushing exploits. HAHA, so wrong but still so funny!! (sorry – im sure its not, just NEVER heard of this issue, and why the hell is it not in a comedy film somewhere?!)

    I will nominate you for every award I ever get (thousands surely?) just on the off chance of getting another gold nugget of information like this. Love you really, Tyson x 🙂


    • theipc

      AWESOME! You know, that’s a good point – why isn’t this affliction in something?? Thanks for your thoughts and I am sure you will get thousands and thousands of awards! = )


  3. I have a song playing in my head right now, too; it was sung by Ray Stevens and is called “The Streak.” The story about doing your Stayin’ Alive dance in a bar is very endearing, and I also had the problem with brushing my teeth when I was younger. I thought I was the only one. Actually I have learned to more or less control it as I have gotten older. No jokes about a gag reflex. Can’t wait to see what your 11 questions will be, when you think them up, that is.


    • theipc

      LOL @ The Streak. I know that song! HA HA! My gagging actually didn’t used to be that bad until I GOT older. It sucks – sometimes it’s so bad I actually throw up – I HATE IT. Hopefully I can come up with some good ones. I looked at yours today and want to answer them but some of them seem a little challenging : )


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