Isaacs Picture Conclusions

GIALLORAMA! THE GIRL WHO KNEW TOO MUCH (1963) THREE TOP HATS

You might also know this movie by the title: The Evil Eye. I don’t know why it would be called that but….. OK. A while back I printed up a Wikipedia list of “Giallo Movies” because I would like to see them all (except for Black Belly of the Tarantula {supposedly someone is going to guest report on that one [I am deathly scared of spiders]}) and this one is at the top of the list. IMDB-bots also have a bunch of user reviews stating “THE ONE THAT STARTED THEM ALL” and all of that so I thought I would give it a shot despite it being from 1963. I don’t hate the 60s, I just don’t love movies that came from them. I don’t like the sound and generally the “Jerry Lewis-y” “goofball music” and I hate the fashion and, you know, whatever.  Well – this one didn’t irritate me the entire time and grate on an open nerve – but this thing was BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING.

It started off with some dude getting busted in an airport in Rome trying to smuggle in a briefcase full of marijuana cigarettes in Kent boxes but then it just slowed way down and just kind of idled for the next hour and ten minutes. YAWN. I mean, the day I am writing this, I just watched this yesterday and I can barely remember what happened, it was so uneventful.  Let’s see…

This hot American chick here (Leticia Roman) heads to Rome to stay with her elderly aunt. The night she gets there the aunt dies and she heads out into the night grief stricken. Immediately she is mugged, her purse is stolen and she faints. When she wakes up she witnesses a murder and she faints again. The next morning she is found laying there in the street and she babbles about the murder but no one believes her. I don’t remember if she faints again or not but the next scene she wakes in a hospital bed with a bunch of creepy nuns looking at her. Then the doctor comes in and diagnoses her as a crazy, hallucinating, alcoholic and sends her home. Luckily a very young John Saxon has “intentions” for her and tells her he believes her story and wants to help her out.

What next? They go to the Aunt’s funeral and her corpse is put into the Earth, god rest her soul, and while Roman’s “Nora” is grieving, the priest introduces her to Aunt Ethels’ neighbor who takes Nora in like she was in love with her or something. Anyway, Nora gets to stay there while the neighbor and her husband are off in Sweden and I don’t really know why but she (Nora) puts talcum powder all over the floor and runs strings around everything – I assume to catch something? A prowler? A cold? In the end she catches Saxon who falls down on the floor and breaks his thumb.

Eventually they go off in search of some reporter who is penniless and homeless and have a day at the beach where Saxon puts his smooth moves on her and kisses her on her mouth! Can you say risque!! Something leads to something else and we find out who the killer is and there’s a pretty cliche ending to the whole thing and Nora digs in her butt pocket and finds one of those packs of Kents and freaks out and throws it off of some terrace and a priest picks it up and heads to church. Oh the comedy! I will agree that this totally had an awesome feel to it and Mario Bava did some wicked work, but this was boring and I couldn’t wait for it to be over. Again – I don’t think this sucks, it’s just not my kind of movie.

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