Do you Good People remember Alexandre Aja’s HIGH TENSION?? Remember how brutal and gory and bloody it was?? Well those boys put out another movie a few years later – different director with Aja producing – called P2 which was also pretty gut wrenching (but not so good IMO) (I mean there’s NO WAY she could have gotten out of that parking garage???) Anyway, they’re back with a remake of the 80’s flick (you can see my thoughts on that HERE if you felt so inclined) and it’s a fucking sick piece of work that scalps the fuck off of the original. If you want to see this be warned, the special effects are particularly nasty and very real looking and not for Good People with loose stomachs. Or bowels.
When I first heard of this, I thought, “OH GOD, Elijah Woods????” A few months later I watched the trailer and I thought it looked pretty fantastic and then I finally got to watch it last week and…
“Yessssss Meester Isaacs??? What did you think??”
There are three things that bothered me about this movie. One is Elijah Woods. Yes, yes he did a good job acting the role – totally against his normal form, yes. BUT I just can’t picture a guy half my height being this sort of ruthless, scalping, depraved killer. I don’t buy it. Plus, I am sure this is how he was directed but, I didn’t like his emotionless delivery. This wasn’t a Mamet or even a Shyamalan film. Second, the entire thing is shot from his perspective – the entire thing – so you basically see him kill people through his eyes. Lots of his hands and looking in mirrors and such. That got old to me after about ten minutes. Also – and this is a cardinal sin to me – he talked what he was typing when he was typing into a computer. That ALWAYS bothers me, ALL THE TIME.
“Reflections of a Sunny Day”
But I got over myself and in the end I really enjoyed the overall product. If you’re not familiar with this, and haven’t read about it on everyone else’s much better written sites, Woods plays a dude who goes around scalping and killing women to make a sort of family, shot from his point of view. WAITAGODDAMNEDSECOND!!!! That’s almost exactly like the premise behind one of the scripts I’ve been trying to write for a year!!! WHATTHEFUCK?!?!?!?!?!? AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
“We didn’t steal your idea, MEESTER!!”
*runs away*
UGH!!!
Anyway, this was pretty good when it was all said and done. Some things bothered me but it was a good, solid production. You definitely haven’t seen a car wreck like the one you’ll see towards the end of this, I guarantee that. If you choose to read these two references to older posts, be aware that they are old and some of the first things I did around here. Meaning: my writing sucks but America Olivo finally shows off her giant cans in this and, while they don’t make up for NEIGHBOR or BITCH SLAP…… it’s about fucking time.
EI over and out! Have great weekends!! I’m off again on Friday so if you felt so kind as to leave me a message I’ll probably be sore from swimming and too much sun so I’ll be sleeping in and nursing a hangover – BUT! – I’ll get back to you later on!
Isaacs Picture Conclusions 
I also say everything I type. Like I just said that. And that. And that. People in my office are starting to stare at me. They just heard that. I also scalp hookers. Probably shouldn’t have said that. Now they’re running. I have to go.
LikeLike
haha this is commenting gold!
LikeLike
I know that it’s late and you’re asleep and I will be right behind you – wait – WHAT??? I just spoke what I was writing and my wife is mad at me.
LikeLike
That sucks about your script! Just add in a giant shark and a helicopter chase and you’ll be good to go. My friend once played me a song he’d written and it turned out he’d just written Golden Brown by The Stranglers.
LikeLike
I was not familiar with that song so I looked it up on YouTube. Good song. Weird time signature.
LikeLike
NICE!
I remember when I was a kid I had an idea about a story about a guy who couldn’t remember things for very long so he wrote what he was doing down in a leather binder (it was the 80s). Then a guy named Gene Wolfe (who is my favorite author) wrote a novel or two about the same thing.
Then – 30 years later, some guy no one’s ever heard of named Christopher Nolan made a wicked movie focusing on the same idea. I should get credit!
LikeLike
All these people going on about how amazing Christopher Nolan is. They have no idea who the real brains are!
LikeLike
Exactly!!
LikeLike
Good song. 🙂 As far as heroin songs go…
LikeLike
😀 glad you enjoyed it. Overall it was nice, it was different. Definitely not without its faults, but it worked out alright!
LikeLike
I agree!! Had some problems but overall not too bad at all : )
LikeLike
Four Top Hats ain’t too shabby….from how you responded to me about it I thought you were more in the Two Scalped Heads area. Hope you feel better after yesterdays drinking campaign.
LikeLike
For this one – I think the overall product stands out as “pretty good” while some of the parts suffered from being crappy. But – as we have been taught: “The needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many”.
LikeLike
What’s the deal with all the mannequins? Was he scalping real women to give his mannequin friends some hair?
LikeLike
YEP!!
LikeLike
Just came out on dvd here so I bought it and am intrigued to see it. Wasn’t a huge fan of High Tension though…….
LikeLike
Damn it, Tyson – no one asked you your opinion on High Tension!!! lol.
LikeLike
Lol – I hoped you see that Gary 😉
LikeLike
YOU didn’t like High Tension??? How can that be??
LikeLike
Fuck yeah, this sound horrible and I like that.
LikeLike
LOL – look for my post out tomorrow morning : )
LikeLike
Definitely want to see this but haven’t yet. As for the script, continue undaunted. This same basic concept has been done many times (just seen it done spectacularly in a Night Gallery episode) and as long as the character(s) are different, it will turn out fine. There’s no copyright on a simple concept 🙂
LikeLike
Thank for the encouragement! The script is actually told from the POV of the weapon (it’s possessed by Satan himself!!) so it won’t be totally the same.
LikeLike
Hey that sounds pretty damn cool! Reminds me a bit of the movie Heavy Metal with the green orb and all the lives it touches (and ruins).
LikeLike
Hopefully we can get somewhere with it!! : )
LikeLike
Arrgh, I can’t decide whether to watch this.
LikeLike
Yes, you should. You may not be crazy about it, but it’s worth a watch to see for yourself, nonetheless.
LikeLike
Good point.
LikeLike
I can guarantee you’ve seen worse : )
But this is very grisly…
LikeLike
Elijah Woods made this role work! I think Eric is the first viewer that I’ve read to not like watching the events unfold through Frank’s POV. I think that’s one of the main attributes that makes this thing feel so unique and separates it from so many of the other recycled horror films. There are definitely some things that could have been executed better, but overall is still good, and definitely worth a watch.
LikeLike
“There are definitely some things that could have been executed better, but overall is still good, and definitely worth a watch.”
Agreed!
LikeLike
Eric, I think the 3rd act felt rushed; had the “high tension” built, and THEN erupted at the right time I think the film would have been much more effective.
And I have a recommendation for you that I think you would personally like. “Would You Rather”. I think it’s right up your alley. Not a great film, or anything, but it’s decent, and I think you’d like it.
LikeLike
I’ve almost pulled the trigger on that a couple of times but never did. Not bad? Jeffrey Combs, right?
I have taken a little mini-vacation from work and blogging – watched several movies (alone and with the wife). Three stand outs – STOKER, THE ORPHAN KILLER (write-up coming out tomorrow) and SEEKING A FRIEND FOR THE END OF THE WORLD (write up looming on a potential new site)
I’ll check it out.
LikeLike
Yeah, your wife may like it, too – if she’s as sick and demented as you and Tyson!! Oh, and me. lol.
Not sure about Jeffrey Combs. It has Brittany Snow. Some of the acting is shoddy as well as some of the writing, but overall is pretty good.
LikeLike
I came for the review and I stayed for the wood. That’s right, Meester, the wood.
LikeLike
If I had to single out ONE GREAT thing about this movie, it would be that blond lady. Speaking of wood….
WHAT???
LikeLike
I’d watch this but that Andrew McCarthy always gets on my nerves.
LikeLike
The mannequin??
LikeLike
I believe it’s just called Mannequin. You gotta respect the shitty 80’s movies with horrible Starship songs & the slut from Sex & The City, dude. 🙂
LikeLike
McCartney was great in this!!
LikeLike
I suppose… But Andie still should have chosen Duckie!
LikeLike
I’m joking; never watched Mannequin, nor intend to. My hilarious joke was supposed to imply Andrew McCartney was the killer in “Maniac”. har – har!
LikeLike
Lol! I totally get it now. 😉 (And my second joke was about Pretty In Pink. Ha!). 🙂
LikeLike
Pfft, doesn’t deserve four top hats and High Tension wash that good either, pfft. LOL, great post!
LikeLike
wasn’t ***
LikeLike
Oh… goodness!!
LikeLike
Joseph…I thought we had a deal? You were to watch the film in it’s original language before making anymore negative comments online. OF COURSE it’s gonna suck when it’s dubbed in english! lol.
Yes, Eric, Joseph watched “High Tension” dubbed in english and now has the wrong impression. I bet High Tension dubbed in english could make shitfest.
LikeLike
When I went and saw High Tension in the theater, only some of it was dubbed and Cecile de France did her own English. It was rough but OK – probably because she was SO… FUCKING… HOT!
LikeLike
Loved her. She made the short hair work – it complimented her high cheek bones; and the toned body…and the way she talked.
LikeLike
It’s a joke LOL, I’m sorry…:(….I will watch it ASAP!
LikeLike
You’d better!! 🙂
And THEN if you hate it, I guess I cannot argue with you anymore; or at least not about High Tension, but we can find another one.
LikeLike
LOL, fair enough :).
LikeLike
The POV got annoying after awhile, and felt like nothing more than just a shameless gimmick to get past the fact that this material wasn’t rich enough to hold a whole film. Good review.
LikeLike
Thank you, Good Sir.
LikeLike
I’m always up for a movie which does thing well. Of course, the scariest thing Elijah Wood has ever done is still going full child molester who just got out of bed to do The Puppet Master: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2otVBGcG1kw
LikeLike
“I’m always up for a movie which does thing well” is, of course, proof that I speak English good.
LikeLike
LOL – AWESOME!
LikeLike
Elijah Wood has made some interesting choices, hasn’t he? I haven’t seen this but I think I’ll check it out!
LikeLike
Be careful Weebs – it’s pretty gruesome!!
LikeLike
I watched this myself the other day. The french chick in this was very nice. Damn, it was gory though. Scalpings in movies really make me wince.
LikeLike
Scalpings are always nasty IMO.
Frenchie was SUPER HOT!
LikeLike