Isaacs Picture Conclusions

A QUICKIE WITH MRS. THE IPC: YOU’RE NEXT

YOURE NEXT 1

This segment is to try and prove to people that I don’t only watch horseshit, non-mainstream movies and that I’m not totally insane. LOL 

*To note – MRS. THE IPC would not EVER go to something like this, so this is our conversation when I got home*

MRS. THE IPC: SO?? How was it??

ME: I TOTALLY FUCKING LOVED IT!

MRS. THE IPC: Was it super scary??

ME: *Thinks* Well.. I mean, I don’t get scared in movies. It had some jumps and all but it was just totally fun and it didn’t take itself seriously and it was bloody and just fun. I’m SO glad I made the decision to go see it.

ME: It would have scared your balls off. I mean, it will totally scare someone who’s a scaredy cat.

YOURE NEXT 3

MRS. THE IPC: So why were they doing it?

ME: Well, remember my friend? (This is a reference to the time I interviewed A.J. Bowen who stars in this…) (That’s a link by the way : ) )

MRS THE IPC: Hey!! He’s your friend!!

YOURE NEXT 2

MRS. THE IPC: How exciting!

ME: I know – I tweeted him about it but he never replied : (

ME: Well, he’s *spoils and ruins the entire movie even though she’ll never watch it*

MRS. THE IPC: Oh, wow.

ME: It was so much fun. The guys that made it are all buddies – I think this is my favorite one they’ve put together.

MRS. THE IPC: Well, good, (term of affection)!

ME: I actually might even go see it again while it’s in theaters…

MRS. THE IPC:  You should! What’s for supper?

ME: Fuck if I know… Hot Wings from the BBQ place?

MRS. THE IPC: Sounds good to me.

*iPad buzzes*

ME: Hey!! Someone responded to my tweet!

MRS. THE IPC: Is it your friend????

ME: Not Bowen but my other friend Joseph – he does The Cinema Monster site.

MRS. THE IPC: What’s he got to say?

ME: He loved it too. It’s really good. Not all serious and shit, just good fun. I really liked the camera work too. There’s a scene where a bunch of people go running up a staircase. I loved it…

ME: That reminds me, I need to go work on something for him. He’s going to a film festival and I’m gonna do a guest post while he’s out. Got something to do for a little bit?

MRS. THE IPC: I can start putting together this (stationary) bike.

ME: OK or I can do it when I get done.

MRS. THE IPC: K! LUB!

ME: LUB!

34 comments

  1. Pingback: Box Office Predictions (23-25th Aug) Results | Tim's Film Reviews

  2. GaryLee828

    Here’s the TRUE version of what happened when Eric arrived home after the movie:

    (Eric walks in the front door)
    ERIC: Hi, hon —
    MRS: Were the fuck were you!?
    ERIC: I went to the movies.
    MRS: I didn’t say you could go to the movies you little asshole!
    ERIC: Oh, I’m sorry —
    MRS: Don’t you sorry me you sorry motherfucker!
    ERIC: Well the movie was really gre —
    MRS: Do I look like I give a fuck how the movie was!?
    ERIC: Umm…
    MRS: Put this fucking stationary bike together!
    ERIC: Okay. (beat) So, what’s for dinner!?
    MRS: I don’t give a shit – I already ate while you were out galavanting around town going to the movies!
    ERIC: Well, what am I supposed to eat?
    MRS: Fix yourself a cassadillah!
    MRS storms out of the room. Eric sighs and approaches the stationary bike and picks up a wrench.
    MRS pushes a button on the CD player from the other room, and Dwight Twilley Band’s “Looking for the Magic” plays. Eric kneels to the floor and inspects a bar. From the living room window a masked man peers in.
    FADE TO BLACK

    Like

  3. Hahaha! I think I prefer Gary’s version of events. And what was this private term of affection used?! I like these Quickie reviews. There seems to be a lot of movie-watching, exercising, and baths in your life…

    Like

  4. Pingback: A Filmster Quickie: You’re Next | The Filmster

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