2 Headed Shark Attack (2012)
Director: Christopher Ray
Cast: Carmen Electra, Charlie O’Connell, Brooke Hogan, Christina Bach
ROFL! I’m sorry *contains laughter* Every time I think about this movie, I can’t help but to laugh at it. Even now, I’m trying to grasp how bad it can be. I mean, I was choosing between two Mega Shark versus movies and this one was original with 2 Headed Shark! DUN DUN DUN! By any possible chance, you probably could still catch this one on Netflix. LOL! I mean if you absolutely want to…
Lets give you a little plot first! A group of students are on a summer camp to learn about the sea and water, etc. This class is lead by Sea King captain Professor Babish. On board we also have his wife, also responsible for medical issues, Anne and the mechanical saVvy one (forgot her name). On their voyage, they are hit by something that breaks their hull. As the mechanic girl repairs the boat, Professor Babish brings his group of students to look for scrap metal in the nearby atoll. As they discover the atoll is flooding, they also learn that they are being hunted by a 2 headed shark.
I really just want to write LOL and end the review right there but okay, we`re going to see how to do this without being too mean. This movie is horrible! Think of everything bad that could happen to the movie and it did. One of the big ones being absolutely ugly CGI. I`m not crazy about it in the first place but this one was just so bad. You chose a more recent movie because I always feel that I can`t comment about an older movie but this one was even worse than that scene in Deep Blue Sea with Samuel L. Jackson. If you’ve seen that movie, you probably will know that part! That was from 1999 and this was made in the very recent 2012.
I knew going into this it was going to be bad acting galore, but it was also one of the reasons I chose this because even if it did suck in the acting, at least for all you guys, at least there was Carmen Electra and even I think she has a hot body. I also know she has this way over exaggerated way of talking because I saw one of her sexy workout videos before to teach people how to be “fit to strip”. The dialogue was just stupid, retarded, ridiculous. No one in this can act and none of the characters did anything that made sense. BUT, if you want to mute it and just watch big breast chicks, then you have a good amount of those. Plus, there are naked chicks as well. Plus, if I had a professor like the dude in this one, I’d quit the course because he’s just so dumb, for one, you always do head counts when you go on field trips instead of just moving along without giving a crap. If he did that, he would have realized something has been chomping away at his students.
The highlight of this flick HAS TO be the 2 headed shark, right? It’s the reason this movie was made in the first place! If you saw that title, I’m sure, like me, you’d think its probably going to be bad anyways. Man, are we ever right? Literally, almost all the shots of the two headed sharks were just a copy of the previous one and another copy of the previous one. Same one, over and over and over again. *roll my eyes* The only exception was the jump attacks and then those were just such bad CGI! Plus, that shark was not intimidating. It was just ugly! So absolutely ugly! Especially in close-up attacks, it was so funny because it looked like it had sponge teeth. The eyes looked like buttons, the chomping motion was like it had flimsy teeth that didn’t sink in; everything was so ridiculously fake!
I think you get the point, right? I definitely hit the jackpot on this one. My last one was just boring but this one was bad. All kinds of bad! Except for one (I guess) almost all the pictures up there 😉 Plus, they didn’t even give me a hot guy to look at! FAIL!
DEFINITE SHITFEST MATERIAL!!!