Here’s another short one for today – I watched this around a month ago and haven’t ever been able to put anything together for it because – to be honest – I really don’t care that much about it. Let’s just get this one out of the way for good.
Once upon a time there was this chick from Australia,
She came over to the states and showed off her genitalia,
This made her quite popular to those who like nudes,
Then she went off and married fucking Tom Cruise,
In 700 films, she showed style and grace,
The last thing I watched, she pissed on some kid’s face,
I’ll never know why I Netflixed The Others,
But I’ll never re-watch if I have my druthers,
Boring and thin and lame and too long,
We’ve all heard many others sing this same song,
Don’t even bother and see The Orphanage instead
So Guillermo Del Toro can fuck with your head.
Well – enough of that nonsense. I was having some writer’s block with this one and attacked it with some rap music and now that we’ve have had a proper, albeit stupid, opening act, let’s get on with our day. The Others is a blatant rip-off of The Sixth Sense without any of the suspense or tension or dead people. Everything takes place in an old house where Kidman goes around opening and shutting doors and looking depressed. The first time I watched this, however many years ago, I figured out what was going on about thirty minutes into it and when the big payoff came, it left me disappointed and rolling my eyes. I have to admit that the movie LOOKS good and if there HADN’T been The Sixth Sense a couple of years earlier, this probably could have been something special but – nope.