Hi everyone! Okay, so… I’m a little nervous right now.
Some of you may be aware that my friend at Cinema Parrot Disco is a huge fan of Disney & Pixar films. When she mentioned the movie Frozen again recently, I decided it was time I “come clean”.
I realize I’m known for my reviews of nasty horror movies filled with gratuitous nudity but I feel like we’ve all become such good friends here that I can start being myself. The truth is… I LOVE Disney films. Frozen was fantastic and Let It Go deserved the Best Song Oscar it received. I don’t know why I’ve been afraid to admit this before now. There’s just something about Disney movies! The cute animals, the beautiful animation, the wonderfully catchy songs I can’t help but whistle while I eat beef jerky and drive to work in my big manly truck, the important life lessons they teach us about being kind to one another & always trying our hardest to be good people… And there’s nothing I like more than a happy ending!
So, in honor of the brilliant Frozen, I thought I’d compile a list of My Five Favorite Disney Princesses: 🙂
5. Jasmine
You have to respect a Disney Princess who won’t be forced into a marriage that’s not based on love. Because love is what makes the world such a beautiful place. Without love, we are nothing. Plus, I’ve got a magic carpet she can ride (while I continue to respect her).
4. Snow White
Her values may be a little old-fashioned but I respect the way Snow White believes in hard work and taking care of those she loves. We’re also both animal-lovers so I know we’d get along beautifully. And my house would always be so clean! (Not that I’d force her to clean all the time – that’s not a woman’s job. I’d respect her decision to be a stay-at-home wife or to become an important businesswoman. Women can be whatever they want to be! I respect & support all their decisions).
3. Merida
I respect Merida’s strong will & bravery. She stands up for what she believes in (and is damn good with a bow & arrow!). Plus that Scottish accent is delightful and her beautiful ginger hair & pale skin would make us the loveliest, palest couple known to man. We could hide in a cave like bats & kiss a lot.
2. Belle
Ahh… Belle. She finds the beauty hidden within the beast and teaches us all that you truly cannot judge a book by its cover. And she reads A LOT. I love that because a brain is always the first thing I look for in a woman. I respect Belle for her values & her mind.
1. Elsa
Oh sweet diva! Elsa is DIVINE. Elsa is the one to make me decide to come out of my shell & express my love for all-things-Disney. Like Elsa, I had a hidden secret. You have no idea how free I now feel. Thank you, Elsa, for teaching me to “Let It Go”! You’ve changed my life. And you have a nice rack. (But I still respect you as human being with boobs and feelings)
Thanks to all of you for letting me get this off my chest and for being my friends. I know you will continue to follow The IPC as it now becomes “An Honest Review from an Honest Disney-Loving Guy“.
*Internet hugs, kisses & glitter for you all!*
We have so much in common, Eric! *RAINBOWHUGS!* : )
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HOW DID THIS HAPPEN????? MY BLOG HAS BEEN TAINTED!!!!!!
#foreshadowing
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you forget to add the tag line at the end APRIL FOOLS!!!! 🙂
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Eric is no fool – he just loves a good Disney movie! : )
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yeah, yeah. I personally DO love Disney movies, but I can’t imagine Eric liking them!
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Right? RIGHT??!?!?!?!
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Everyone knows I’m an April Fool…..
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Jasmine is a total hottie, i wouldn’t mind her rubbing my lamp (i’m aware that doesn’t make any sense)
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It makes sense, Mike. Coming from you. ; )
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She can ride my magic carpet any day….. WHAT!??
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Jasmine is 15.
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Buzzkill….
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Reblogged this on THE ENIGMA MACHINE and commented:
Eric comes out with his perversion for animated princesses. Absolutely no one was surprised. More news to come….
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THANKS MIKE!!! I think….
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I smell bullshit! Although I would absolutely love this to be true. There just isn’t enough talk of boobs and defiling these princesses for this to really be Eric 🙂
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Eric is a sweetheart!!! He’d never disrespect these lovely princesses. ; )
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This is VERY TRUE….
#princessboobs
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I don’t know how this happened out here….
#boobs
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Being released on April Fools I can’t decide if this is true or your messing with us but I don’t care, I’ve mentioned my love for animated films before. Good list, only missing Mulan 😀
“the wonderfully catchy songs I can’t help but whistle while I eat beef jerky and drive to work in my big manly truck” Haha I have actually listened to some Disney sound tracks lifting weights, very funny/weird experience 😀
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Eric loves when Mulan dresses up as a boy because he’s a big fan of cross-dressing himself.
Hahaha! Lifting weights while listening to Disney soundtracks? Yeah – I’m pretty sure Eric does that too. ; )
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Haha that doesn’t surprise me 😀
Just don’t listen to ‘Let it Go’ as you do a bench press Ha! xD
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I listen to the theme song from True Detective….
#truth
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LOOOOL! Oh yes, Eric comes clean! 😛
Honesty Time: I have not heard Let It Go.
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Whaaaat? How could you have missed it? Lol. It’s everywhere! : )
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LOL I didn’t see it in theatre, I don’t watch TV and I don’t listen to the radio… I know that makes me look ridiculous hahaha!
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HAHAHA Zoe!!!!
Wait… what???
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Wait… ’tis true!
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I don’t mean about the song…..
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Hehehehe
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HAHA!!! 🙂
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This is beautiful.
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Eric is beautiful. I always knew he had this in him. : )
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Thanks Anna!!!
Wait a minute…..
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WHAT THE FUCK NO TIANA RACIST BASTARD
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At least I’m not Greek.
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He wouldn’t mind having their tongues stuck together but she doesn’t put enough hot sauce on her beignets.
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What the fuck’s a beignet? What is this, England??
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New Orleans, you cretin! ; )
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WHO’S A CRETIN??????
Oh wait – ME!!!
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Belle was one of my favorite Disney Princesses too. There is nothing wrong with admitting your love of these women. You don’t have to be all about respecting their minds. That’s great, and all , but you can be honest too and say that some of them are hot. Jasmine, Belle, and Ariel were young at the time, but hey so was I when I first watched those movies.
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Belle is the best! I love Eric’s honesty here – he’s such a sweetie. I knew it!! : )
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What about that delightful little flower known as Ursula? She’s owns her own business, she’s self-sufficient, and she’s got lots of cushion for the pushin’.
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I don’t know – there’s something fishy about her…
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Ha! Well done, T9 🙂
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OMG this is HILARIOUS. I am dying over here. This is my fave post ever. Elsa has a nice rack I liked that you admitted that because all the rest of the choices were so respectful in tone.
WordPress is a place where we can get all those secrets off our chests, whether you are an A cup or DD, get it off your chest girl.. I mean boy. hahaha
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Hahaha! He tried to remain respectful but Elsa is just so damn SEXY. ; ) She’s definitely not a DD, though. Now we know what Eric prefers. ; )
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Well u know how he is !! He likes em busty gf!
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I like em all…………………
#boobs
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HAHAHA!!!!!
#ChestyLaRoux
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I kept waiting for the April Fools to kick in, but……..
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It’s all true!!!! I knew Eric & I had something in common! : )
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The real Disney Princess is Eric, himself…..
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Actually, Luke…….. I’m a…………..
……….little teapot…………
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Mrs Potts???
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HOTS FOR POTTS!!!!
#potts
#msm
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#brb
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hmmmmmmmmmmmm………
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…dude…da fuck?
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Be supportive! Eric opened his heart to us all! ; )
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Eric… I thought I had an ally in my crusade against Disney. I don’t know you anymore! *Sobs*
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Of course you know that I didn’t actually write this….
*hugs*
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Oh thank god…
*return hugs*
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Don’t be afraid of your inner feelings, Eric…….
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The inside of THE IPC is cut up and half dead…
QUICK!! Without Googling name the song that’s from… NO CHEATING Mrs. Music.
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Um. Pearl Jam?
#ItotallyGoogled
Lol!
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Yep….
Pearl Jam is almost the ONLY group I liked from the 90s.
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Interesting… I had that album but had kind of stopped listening to them by then. That first album is a classic, though. How about Temple of the Dog? Wtf? I’m meant to be asleep. I’m sick. : ( lol
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I HATED Temple of the Dog. Mainly because my old roommate played that fucking album CONSTANTLY and I’ve never cared for Chris Cornell. Remind me one day to tell you the story of how I met him. Out for now.
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Lol. Okay. It had one good song. Talk tomorrow! : )
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I like the clash of Disney Princesses and the True Detective pic at the top. Classic stuff!
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HA!!!! I HAD to get rid of what was up there all day yesterday!!
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Awwww! I liked The IPC being all pretty…. : (
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THE IPC is Most Unclean….. : (
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Congrats on coming clean with this info 🙂
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FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. I cannot stop laughing. These might be the best tags yet. But I have one qualm–Snow White?! Snow White is a useless bitch. Eric, you need to upgrade to Pocahontas. Friend to animals AND a badass. Well done, you crazy kids. 😉
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I’m sure Eric would love to be just around her riverbend. ; )
I have no idea what that means….
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Oh I think you know EXACTLY what that means. 😉
…Yeah I’m not really sure either. I’m sure the boys would have theories, but maybe we shouldn’t get them involved…
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Oh dear – let’s definitely not ask the boys. Especially Mike! ; )
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Um.
At first I was thinking you had written this. But then . . . I realized there are no swear words anywhere in any of this. Can’t be Eric. 🙂
The comments confirm my suspicions.
And Mutant, I agree with four of the five, especially three (who would be my number one – forget that she’s a Pixar creation) and one. But I gotta say: Snow White? No. Give me Tiana. Give me Ariel. Give me Rapunzel. And totes-ma-goats give Giselle. Oh Giselle.
Wait. I might be thinking of Amy Adams.
But I’ll take Giselle, too. 🙂
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Eric is a sweetheart! He was just scared to admit that before now. ; ) (They won’t include Giselle as an official Disney Princess. Don’t know why. Anna & Elsa aren’t official yet but will be. Yes, I’m sad. Lol.)
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They don’t need to include her. I’ll do it for them. 🙂
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I’m a little late but I just love this Eric! Even if you did pick Elsa over Belle! Since you’ve already proven yourself to be such a great dancer I think you should post a video of you singing Let It Go!❤️❤️❤️
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Kim!!!!!!
HAHAHAH!!!!!! I’ve got the moves!! Shake it don’t beak it!!! : )
I don’t think anyone in the world needs to hear me sing!!!
#lovekim
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Oh I think we solo need to hear you sing!
#singericsing
#letitgo
#loveeric
#bellerules
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HA!!! I might be more apt to sing along to that song I posted the other day!!
#toadies
#iburn
#looooovekim
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Oh yeah! I can see it now 🙂
#loooveeric
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: ))))))))))))))))
#loooooooooooooooooooooooovekim
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#almostlunchtime
#kisses
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What’s for lunch over there??
#hugsandkisses
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Fresh bread, salad, and apple. Yum! You?
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Leftover ribeye and rice : )
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Yum!
#enjoy
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I hope to!!
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🙂 🙂 🙂
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I did!!
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Yay! 😊
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: )))))))))))
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I must admit that this post rules. Probably the best thing on The IPC. 😉
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And that is saying something!
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Lol! I love the Magic Mike post too. 😉
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I haven’t gotten to that one yet. I’ll have to hunt it down. ☺️
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It’s a good one : )
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After watching Grabbers last night, I think you should get a special movie reviewer award!
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Me or Eric?! Lol. Grabbers rules.
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Ha! 😊
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You liked it???
*winces*
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Why do you only remember the ones where I don’t agree with you?!?! Lol. You don’t like ANY of MY favorites. Hell, you can’t even name one! Ha! 😉
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I was asking Kim, you wanker! I know you liked Grabbers!
#tosser
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Lol! You make me paranoid!!!!
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Loved it! And it had Russell Tovey in it who I also love! Although I was hoping he’d somehow come walking back into town at the end after being bashed to who knows where. I was thinking that maybe since he was so totally sloshed he’d survive. Oh well. It was still awesome.☺️ By the way, I love your new thumbnail. She’s, er, very enthusiastic.😏
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You would!!!! Damn that thing gets a lot of hits….
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Does it?! Lol. Damn – I should’ve stuck it on my own blog! But then I wouldn’t have made it as filthy… 😉
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It really does – like Wrong Turn….
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