Isaacs Picture Conclusions

MY FAVORITE DISNEY PRINCESSES

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Hi everyone! Okay, so… I’m a little nervous right now.

Some of you may be aware that my friend at Cinema Parrot Disco is a huge fan of Disney & Pixar films. When she mentioned the movie Frozen again recently, I decided it was time I “come clean”.

I realize I’m known for my reviews of nasty horror movies filled with gratuitous nudity but I feel like we’ve all become such good friends here that I can start being myself. The truth is… I LOVE Disney films. Frozen was fantastic and Let It Go deserved the Best Song Oscar it received. I don’t know why I’ve been afraid to admit this before now. There’s just something about Disney movies! The cute animals, the beautiful animation, the wonderfully catchy songs I can’t help but whistle while I eat beef jerky and drive to work in my big manly truck, the important life lessons they teach us about being kind to one another & always trying our hardest to be good people… And there’s nothing I like more than a happy ending!

So, in honor of the brilliant Frozen, I thought I’d compile a list of My Five Favorite Disney Princesses: 🙂

5. Jasmine

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You have to respect a Disney Princess who won’t be forced into a marriage that’s not based on love. Because love is what makes the world such a beautiful place. Without love, we are nothing. Plus, I’ve got a magic carpet she can ride (while I continue to respect her).

4. Snow White

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Her values may be a little old-fashioned but I respect the way Snow White believes in hard work and taking care of those she loves. We’re also both animal-lovers so I know we’d get along beautifully. And my house would always be so clean! (Not that I’d force her to clean all the time – that’s not a woman’s job. I’d respect her decision to be a stay-at-home wife or to become an important businesswoman. Women can be whatever they want to be! I respect & support all their decisions).

3. Merida

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I respect Merida’s strong will & bravery. She stands up for what she believes in (and is damn good with a bow & arrow!). Plus that Scottish accent is delightful and her beautiful ginger hair & pale skin would make us the loveliest, palest couple known to man. We could hide in a cave like bats & kiss a lot.

2. Belle

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Ahh… Belle. She finds the beauty hidden within the beast and teaches us all that you truly cannot judge a book by its cover. And she reads A LOT. I love that because a brain is always the first thing I look for in a woman. I respect Belle for her values & her mind.

1. Elsa

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Oh sweet diva! Elsa is DIVINE. Elsa is the one to make me decide to come out of my shell & express my love for all-things-Disney. Like Elsa, I had a hidden secret. You have no idea how free I now feel. Thank you, Elsa, for teaching me to “Let It Go”! You’ve changed my life. And you have a nice rack. (But I still respect you as human being with boobs and feelings)

Thanks to all of you for letting me get this off my chest and for being my friends. I know you will continue to follow The IPC as it now becomes “An Honest Review from an Honest Disney-Loving Guy“.

*Internet hugs, kisses & glitter for you all!*

115 comments

  6. Tim The Film Guy

    Being released on April Fools I can’t decide if this is true or your messing with us but I don’t care, I’ve mentioned my love for animated films before. Good list, only missing Mulan 😀

    “the wonderfully catchy songs I can’t help but whistle while I eat beef jerky and drive to work in my big manly truck” Haha I have actually listened to some Disney sound tracks lifting weights, very funny/weird experience 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  9. Pingback: Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) Review | Cinema Parrot Disco

  11. The Vern

    Belle was one of my favorite Disney Princesses too. There is nothing wrong with admitting your love of these women. You don’t have to be all about respecting their minds. That’s great, and all , but you can be honest too and say that some of them are hot. Jasmine, Belle, and Ariel were young at the time, but hey so was I when I first watched those movies.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  13. snapcracklewatch

    OMG this is HILARIOUS. I am dying over here. This is my fave post ever. Elsa has a nice rack I liked that you admitted that because all the rest of the choices were so respectful in tone.

    WordPress is a place where we can get all those secrets off our chests, whether you are an A cup or DD, get it off your chest girl.. I mean boy. hahaha

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  19. caragale

    FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. I cannot stop laughing. These might be the best tags yet. But I have one qualm–Snow White?! Snow White is a useless bitch. Eric, you need to upgrade to Pocahontas. Friend to animals AND a badass. Well done, you crazy kids. 😉

    Like

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  20. jjames36

    Um.

    At first I was thinking you had written this. But then . . . I realized there are no swear words anywhere in any of this. Can’t be Eric. 🙂

    The comments confirm my suspicions.

    And Mutant, I agree with four of the five, especially three (who would be my number one – forget that she’s a Pixar creation) and one. But I gotta say: Snow White? No. Give me Tiana. Give me Ariel. Give me Rapunzel. And totes-ma-goats give Giselle. Oh Giselle.

    Wait. I might be thinking of Amy Adams.

    But I’ll take Giselle, too. 🙂

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