Remember this one?? I remember the first time I saw this I didn’t really like Denzel Washington. Thinking about it, I don’t really know why. OH!! I HATED that fucking Training Day movie!! I think I resented him winning best actor for it and was mad about the whole thing. FUSS FUSS FUSS. CRY CRY CRY. But I gave this a watch years ago and I fucking totally loved it and I sat down and watched it again the other day and it’s still pretty fucking good ten years later. The only thing I didn’t care much for here is Tony Scott’s increasingly jittery and brain seizing cinematography. Oh, and Marc Anthony. I don’t know who’s worse, him or John Leguizamo. Barf.Never heard of it? Washington plays some sort of washed up Ex-Military who takes a job as security, hauling young cutie Dakota Fanning around. One day she gets kidnapped and he gets shot and, after he recovers, he sets out to get her back, leaving a trail of bloody corpses in his wake. Also to note – this movie was banned in North America for the explicit butt sex he has with Mexican prostitutes and that deep throat Blowie he gets from Radha Mitchell.
Just kidding about that last part – was wondering if anyone was actually reading this. I’m still surprised at how violent this movie is, being mainstream and all, but it is and I liked it! And it turned me into a Washingtonian. I also like how I just spelled “into” as “inot” about ten times before I used the auto-correct. I also like how I’m really hungry and have a conference call in 16 minutes. I better go get something to eat. Be right back.I’m back with a bowl of pasta salad and a fruit punch powerade. Lunch of champs, eh? See this picture below. In this scene Washington is explaining to this gentleman that he is going to insert his erect penis into that man’s butthole and thrust inside of him for exactly 7 minutes. He is then going to release a large amount of ejaculate onto his hairy back and use it as shaving cream to tidy that fucking mess up. Am I kidding on the last one??? Is he really going to shave that man’s back?? Or is he explaining how to read an analog watch??? Did I really use the word ejaculate??? Are these really my search term hits for today????
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We’ll never know I guess!!! Or do we????
P.S. There’s a fun looking movie called All Cheerleaders Die coming out on VOD today. You all know how much I love a murdery cheerleader movie!! This looks right up my alley!! WHOOP!