BY: MOST UNCLEAN
WHAT IN THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING SHIT? You might remember that last week I did some pieces on a few of the TCM movies – I didn’t really love any of them but I thought they were OK enough. I never got a hold of the “TCM 2” sequel but I don’t really care that much about it. But I did watch this and this thing is absolutely FUCKING WRETCHED. I mean it’s “The Germans are bombing us!!!” wretched. I suppose I should qualify that last bit. I vividly remember a sequence in time when I was in the fourth grade. This is when people start getting their hormones and liking boys and girls. I remember I had the puppy love for this chick in my class and we were all sitting there eating lunch one day and I cut an SBD fart and it stunk up the whole room and someone screamed “The Germans are bombing us!!!” So the teacher demanded that the culprit confess or we’d lose our after lunch playground privilege so I did and everyone laughed at me and I got sent to the Principal’s office and got detention. It was a traumatizing experience that still haunts me. Needless – I didn’t get my first kiss with her….
Oh well, her loss I’m sure!!!
#shestheluckyone
#mostunclean
Anyway, speaking of chicks – remember last week when I asked if Leatherface was supposed to be a Man/Woman? Well one of the Most Beloveds came around and explained that this is loosely based on a real life figure who wanted to make himself into a woman so he wore women’s faces. Well – in this mother fucker I guess he finally got what he wanted because he’s Full On Woman complete with make-up, high pitched histrionics and screaming and – Jesus Christ this was awful. Did ANYONE think this was a good movie??? It was FUCKING MISERABLE!! Did anyone sit back after this was over and think “GOD DAMN, SON!!! WE DID IT!!!! Now, let’s go get high on cocaine and grass and fuck some people in their buttholes!!”
#pappy
#churninthatbutter
In the one potentially good part, our group of idiots stumble into some sort of fucking trailer where a woman and her shoulder padded jacket are working at midnight on, say, a Saturday night. Well, some commotion with some teenage boys happens outside and she decides to flash them her tits. I’ve never seen a worse body double boob attempt in my life. It would be like me doing this:
“Look out ladies! Look out world!!! Here come my titties!!”
And cut to this:
And I don’t even want to fucking talk about this:
or this:
In fact I don’t even want to talk about this mother fucker any more. Mercifully this god dammed DVD had a scratch on it so it stopped working at about 2/3 through it so I didn’t have to finish it. THANK FUCKING GOD. I had big plans to make a small movie about this thing, but then I realized it might be hard to do in an office building full of people especially with the ending I had planned. But – since this is Shitfest…. here’s the closing shot before we cut to the credits (you can click that to make it bigger – IF YOU DARE!!!!!):
That’s going to cost you some extra postage. Make sure you stamp that shit.
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USPS Flat Rate Shipping is the way to go!
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I want every movie production to now end with: “GOD DAMN IT SON! WE DID IT!”
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I’m going to EXPECT this after your next video.
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You got detention for farting ?
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I did. It was a strict Episcopal school…. I also got suspended for saying Tanya Tucker is a Fucker.
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But what were you supposed to do?
Haha! She totally is! My favorite one I heard back then was “Gretchen Veter has a pussy and a peter.”
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A gentleman relieves his gas in the restroom, I was told.
HAHAHAHA!! GOOD ONE!!!
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No wonder you’re so fucked up.
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yep….
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ALWAYS blame the Christians.
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I also got suspended for peeing my name in the snow….
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Yeah, I think this one was ultra low-budget and poorly executed across the board. The third installment of the franchise before this one was “Leatherface” and was much better; it wasn’t great, but at least it wasn’t SF material.
I can’t believe the company you work for is so strict they won’t let you record yourself taking loud, giant shits in the men’s room! Don’t they know this is the social media age and we document by phone every detail of our lives? Why should the bathroom be excluded?
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I KNOW!! First they shut down WIFI and then shut down filming ourselves shitting!!!!
WTF???????
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You need to quit.
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Take this job and shove it!!
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That Netflix turd brings up wonderful memories of Caddyshack.
“It’s no big deal!!!” lol
This movie sounds positively wretched. Then again, I’ve always thought the entire TCM series was kinda stupid. Never got my attention. Am I an outcast on that opinion? Sure. Sure I am. But at least I’m not a Leatherface tranny
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
LOL – I haven’t really liked any of them either….
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HAHAHAHA that last photo is gross! I don’t blame you for saving this one for shitfest it looks ridiculous!!!
xoxoxo
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
XOXOXO
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Eeeew!
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YEP……………..! Disgusting movie!!
🙂
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Fourth grade? Isn’t that a little young for hormones? You horny, farty thing! Some things never change, huh? ; )
Oh. And this movie sounds shit.
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Where did you grow up???? INSIDE a church?? Or were you in fourth grade when you were six?? Around here, boys and girls start liking each other early…
#propagate
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Hahaha! Oh my god. Why do I actually want to watch this?
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The answer: YOU DON’T!!!!!!!!
Love,
eric
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Wait I’m confused–which picture is the picture of you??? 😉 This sounds terrible. I’m sorry you had to go through this.
#longliveshitfest
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Matthew McConaughey did some truly dodgy stuff earlier on… #scarred
Great post!
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HAHAHA!!!
THANK YOU!!!
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Very good show!
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LOL!
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That woman working away in a shoulder-padded jacket on a Saturday night… is me. My life is pathetic.
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😦
I hate it!!! Come to work with me!!
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OKAY!
Can I be Vice President of the Water Cooler Chatter?
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YOU ALREADY ARE!!!!!
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Christ, how many of these films have there been ?
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WAY TOO FUCKING MANY!!
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I am not making that pic bigger! No way… haha Sounds like an awesome movie HAHAHA.
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
#officepoop
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#grossssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
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HAHAHAHAHA!!
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Um. Where’d you get the shit? Not the crappy movie. The actual shit?
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HAHAHA!!!
Don’t tell anyone…. it’s a Baby Ruth….
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Seriously? Looks exactly like shit.
That doesn’t say much for Baby Ruth. 🙂
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