BY: MOVIEROB
Most people who know me, know that I kinda, sorta like movies. 🙂
I can usually find some (even minor) redeeming factor in most movies, but while searching for a movie to review for Summer Shitfest I was totally stumped as to what to review because it’s very hard for me to rewatch a movie that I thought was so horrendous that I would deem it Shitfest worthy.
After racking my brain for weeks, I finally decided on a title (turns out that Eric actually loved it) but I kept pushing off watching it because again I WANT to enjoy watching a movie, not to sit thru torturous agony for 2 hours.
Well, the other day, all, those plans were just completely thrown out the window (or flushed down the toilet as the case may be) because I watched another movie that I had anticipated for months and was in complete agony for 2-plus hours.
So my choice for Summer Shitfest is Need for Speed (2014)
The movie was appropriately named because I think in order to fully enjoy this movie, you most definitely need to be on fuckin speed. (Good thing Aaron Paul is in it, maybe he can give you some Meth.)
There was no plot and the dialogue was pure shit.
You’d think that with 7 movies in the Fast and Furious Franchise and the plethora of street or highway racing movies over the last 50 years, they would have at least tried to make a movie that made some sense in order to compete.
Apparently, they just wanted to make money, so the best way to do that is to make a fun trailer, gets the asses in the seats and then cha-ching, you make lots of money, and it doesn’t matter how fucking stupid the movie is because the viewers have already paid their 10 bucks and there are no refunds at the cinemaplex.
I think this fan trailer for this movie is much better than the movie itself (and it was made by kids)
http://www.topparodies.com/parody/need-for-speed-movie-trailer-4-kids-parody-dub/33157
The acting was completely stale and I really just wanted everyone to die in a spectacular massive car crash. (that would have made this watchable)
I kept looking at the clock and felt like crying because this movie was soooo long, 2 hours and 10 minutes is waaaaaay too long for a stupid road race movie with no plot, they should have cut out half the scenes and given us a shorter tighter shitty movie.
I decided that the best way to do this review would be to give you all a quiz to see who knows their off road racing movies.
So without further ado, here are 10 pictures from 10 road racing movies that are most definitely better than this turkey.
For this contest, whoever is able to guess what movies these pics are from, will be able to force Eric and I to each review 10 movies (5 for each of us) of your choice over the next few months. Send your guesses to either Eric {ei@theipc.me} or to me need4speed@movierob.net
If no one guesses all of them, whoever has the most correct guesses will be declared the winner.
Please don’t post your guesses in the comments (you’ll be helping someone else instead of yourself) 🙂 only send them by email.
Good luck to you all!!!
Rob (and Eric)
Let’s see how you all do!!!!!
thanks Eric! You really inspire me to have fun writing a review for such a totally shitty movie!
LikeLike
LOL! THANK YOU, Rob!!
LikeLike
btw, just noticed that you choose MSM for the link pic. great choice. guess that means you DO pay attention 🙂
LikeLike
Reblogged this on and commented:
I recently reviewed the movie Need for Speed for Eric’s Shitfest. Take a look at my review and let’s see who can win the contest that Eric and I have challenged you all to do!
Thanks to Eric for sponsoring Shitfest summer!
LikeLike
It’s so embarassing to say that I only know of Fast and Furious.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s ok, lady!!
LikeLike
no need to be embarrassed. s’alright
LikeLike
hahahah same.
LikeLike
I actually quite enjoyed this when I watched it! It’s better than Jack!
LikeLike
Jack the Bear?
LikeLike
No, Robin Williams’ Jack. MovieRob loves it!
LikeLike
whats wrong with Jack, Mikey?
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s a trick, all of those stills are from The Love Boat.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The WHAT Boat?????
LikeLike
The “Tug” Boat
LikeLike
That’s more like it, Ace.
LikeLike
🙂 that’s definitely more interesting than this movie was….
LikeLike
Yeah, definitely not something I have been interested in seeing, and this just again proves why it isn’t on my radar, Aaron Paul or not…
LikeLike
JB,
I NEVER have had any desire to see this stupid thing either 🙂
SSC
LikeLike
PSC,
Glad we on the same page (still).
JB
LikeLike
JB,
*HUGS*
TGMJS
LikeLike
skip it Zoe!
LikeLike
Two hours and ten minutes? Wow, not even some primo blue meth could save that ship from sinking. Unfortunately I haven’t studied up on road racing films so I know like one film out of those ten, but can’t wait to find out who wins!
LikeLike
Methamphetamines????
ANNA!!!!!!
LikeLike
Not even once!!!
LikeLike
OK GOOD!!!
Let’s stick to our love of Quaaludes!
LikeLike
sorry. none take place in Aussieland Anna.
nothing could save this one, not even nudity 🙂
LikeLike
Need for Speed was over 2 hours? What? lol.
LikeLike
Does this mean you fell asleep while watching it Gary?
LikeLike
Heck no! I would never watch this in the first place. I thought it looked terrible. lol. I just don’t know why in the hell it needed to be 130 minutes. I mean like WHAT plot was so intricate that it took so long to unfold? lol.
LikeLike
I wish I could tell you that there wss a plot, but I didnt see one
LikeLike
I’d never even try to guess all of those movies!! LOL
: )
XOXOXOXO
#obligatoryboobshotforeric
hahahaha
LikeLike
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Wonderful tag!!!
#adriennebarbeausboobs
XOXOXOXOX
LikeLike
cant hurt to try Melissa 🙂
LikeLike
Disappointing that this is what Aaron Paul chose to make after coming off of one the best shows on TV. This piece of crap! Sounds horrible but I think Eric and the boys will love that first pic (boobs!).
LikeLike
Adrienne B, baby!!!
LikeLike
I knew it! That’s an Eric and Brian photo if I ever saw one. See Rob loves you guys.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And believe me, the pic Rob sent was WAY too small for this post!!!
#youknowit
#brianhasgoodtaste
#butnottomorrow
LikeLike
I SEE what you did you blew it up.
#duh
#ericbrianandboobsduh
LikeLike
Can you tell I am getting caught up!! OMG what is wrong with me I haven’t been on the blogs in a week wtf… call Jesus call 911 asap.
LikeLike
You’ve been busy hobnobbing with some costumed freaks n geeks : )
Obviously I can’t speak for The Probies but maybe me and Mrs IPC can make it out there next year : )
LikeLike
Yes I’ve had so much crap going on… back to reality my blog and blog friends. Yes you should come I think you guys would love it! 🙂 Plus it is always nice here.
LikeLike
Excellent!! Would love to go back to LA and see old friends then head south for SDCC : )
LikeLike
Agreed yes it is a quick trip south and there are tons of things to do here and see. Just sitting and people watching is a fun thing to do during the con. lol
LikeLike
Sounds good to me, lady!
LikeLike
I know the movie in THAT pic, at least! Woohoo! : )
LikeLike
Is SF gonna extend into August or wrap-up soon? Well, it is called SF “Summer” and not July, therefore can go another month. 🙂
LikeLike
Just two more days left, Monday and Tuesday and then it’s a wrap!
LikeLike
Birdemic on Tuesday??
LikeLike
YEP!
LikeLike
Awesome; what kind of review? Video, audio or a write-up??
LikeLike
8 short videos for your viewing pleasure 🙂
LikeLike
Saved the best 4 last!!
LikeLike
There’s a lot of colorful language directed toward the person who recommended that film…..
LikeLike
LOL. I told you that when the person who originally recommended it to me I wanted to punch him in the face, so it’s understandable. lol. But what was worse for me was I blindsided b/c he pranked me and told me it was really good and I had to watch it ASAP. As with me, I let you know what to expect going in. lol. Maybe one day Scrotey will forgive me. I already know you have!! 🙂
LikeLike
be sure to wear your headphones when you watch those videos…
LikeLike
I’ll be at home when looking at this site. Someone at work saw the Shitfest banner at top of the page and tattled on me. lol.
LikeLike
Lame!
LikeLike
lol Rob this is a great review. And this movie made me want to cry as well, it was soooooo boring.
For me, it was a case of the whole “i told myself so”‘s. I could have foreseen this coming and yet I still went and got tortured!
LikeLike
yea, i felt exactly the same way Tom
LikeLike
I don’t really do racing movies, so I don’t know many of the pics…But good review!!! Lol. Sorry it sucked, Rob.
LikeLike
glad it sucked, b/c I needed something for shitfest 🙂
LikeLike
Haha true!
LikeLike
Great review, Rob! This is SO not my type of movie so I’ll be avoiding it. ; ) And… DAMN! I know maybe five of those movies in the pictures. Oh how I’d love to get Eric to watch five movies I’ve picked!!!! : (
LikeLike
Tnx Mutant
If you really know that many, i think you’re leading the pack right now, so you may actually get your wish 🙂
make sure to send me and eric your guesses
LikeLike
Oh yeah… When do you want guesses by???
LikeLike
Before the end of the week –
#youllnevermakeit
LikeLike
Aw MAN! What do you consider the end of the week? Sunday??? ; )
LikeLike
For you?? Sure 🙂
#maybe
LikeLike
More importantly you need to send me your shitfest votes!!
#lazy
LikeLike
Aw MAN!!! When do I have to do THAT by?!?! #fartoolazy ; )
LikeLike
is there any particular sort of film either of you guys don’t enjoy? after all, if someone gets to force you to watch a film, it should be a film we know you’re gonna hate 🙂 otherwise, where’s the fun?
LikeLike
I got your email and have to check it with the list Rob sent me (I don’t even know them all).
I’ll watch anything just – no spiders please. They make me vomit. (For real)
LikeLike
OK, no spiders. That rules out Arachnaphobia and The Incredible Shrinking Man. How do you feel about ants?
LikeLike
Ants are ok 🙂
LikeLike
Niall, you’re starting to scare me. why does a movie need to include creepy crawlers? I’m looking forward to the winner giving me 5 good movies to watch that I’ll enjoy, not shitfest entries 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
ok, no shitty horror flicks. if i win i’ll try to pick 5 films for each of you that i think you might like.
LikeLike
I would have zero chance in the contest, so I won’t bother. But, Rob, I will say you’re right. Need for Speed is utter shit.
LikeLike
Pingback: Strangers On A Train (1951) IMDB Top 250 Guest Review | Cinema Parrot Disco
Pingback: Harold and Maude (1971) |
Pingback: Before Sunrise (1995) |
Pingback: Grabbers (2012) |
Pingback: Amelie (2001) |
Pingback: I Origins (2014) |