Well….. SHITFEST SUMMER is over and we’re all hungover and have the DTs but that doesn’t mean that I’ve stopped watching shitty movies – after all – that’s what this site was originally intended to be… a place where we could sit around and talk about bullshit movies and get loaded on beer and Jager shots and get our tits out and all of that shit. You know, like the local pub you can walk home from when you’re good and pissed. So here we are with a very lame 2008 movie that really has jack shit to offer anyone and by “jack shit” i mean = nothing. I mean, for reals, this movie started off incredibly stupid and then after about five minutes I was all:
Imagine me playing a trumpet that makes the WAAAAAAAAAAAH WAAAAAH WUUUUUH sounds. But I pressed on because I love you wand want to protect you from this shit and even kind of liked this broad even though she couldn’t act for shit:
She seemed peppy and fun and then the director even came around and teased us with a little bit of this:
And then it just kept getting worse and worse. The theory that that this movie is about: a group of actors get cast to film a Reality “serial-killer-murder-house” movie might be true but in reality, it’s so fucking dark that you can’t see what’s going on half of the time, these people slip in and OOT of their Canadian accents, sometimes even during one scene and there’s a big twist thing that happens towards the end that’s gonna make you shit your pants it’s so fucking terrifying but it really isn’t because it’s stupid and we all saw that coming.
At one point, fans of The Boobs might get a little excited because after we’ve been introduced to Boob Girl:
she goes to do her bathtub scene and it looks like this:
THANKS for NOTHING, Assface! I tried lightening it up but there’s still no big payoff:
And by “big payoff” I don’t mean that we would all have a collective orgasm at the site of these things but at least we could do our obligated investigation into how they look and what they might feel like bopping up and down on your face. Because that’s what we all do, right? Right? RIGHT???!?!?!?!
Well… poop… anyway = this movie pretty much sucked ALTHOUGH – I do think this could have been good if they had had some moneys to bring in more talent, behind the camera and in front of it. Aside from the miserable opening, the story wasn’t all ass-up like you might think. So, with some money maybe we could have witnessed a better product. Better actors, better camera… oh…. and some fucking lights!!!
#beingabletoseewhatsgoingonistheshit
On another note – this being the big day after Shitfest – I have an experimental post coming out this afternoon that I would love your feedback on. Please check it out!
You started the post talking about getting loaded and taking your tits out for a walk and ended the post saying you’re doing something experimental this afternoon.
I’m fascinated. Can’t wait.
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Well – I hope it lives up to the hype…
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or – I hope the build up matches the climax….
BAM – that just happened!
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It rarely works that way though, amiright?
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Dear PSC,
This looks bloody awful! Such a pity Shitfest is over now 😦
Love,
JB
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Dear JB,
I know – this totally sucked AND shitfest is over….
And I get all mainstream tomorrow…..
CRY CRY CRY
Love,
GSC
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My Kindest Chop,
Mainstream tomorrow you say, eh? Will see about that! 😛
Well, there will be another Shitfest sometime 🙂 This one was successful.
Also, we need another social sometime.
Love,
JB
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Kindest JB,
Yes – a fucking regular movie – but I actually liked it.
I’m already plotting for the next Shitfest… maybe I’ll sell merchandise…
YEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love,
GSC
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Sweet GSC,
I’ll bet!
Yay! OMG that sounds like a damn fine idea. Consider me interested! 🙂
Love,
JB
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Dear JB,
The gears are really turning 🙂
Love,
GSC
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No worries, SF Winter (or Fall, whichever) will be here in a few months and in the meantime we are going to watch “Dolemite” for the SF social that will be around the corner!! (like the way I took over the IPC and told Eric what we’re going to watch without even asking him?) lol. I think if I made Eric sit thru Birdemic AND Dolemite, him and Scrotey may map quest me and invade my house in the middle of the night and beat me up. Well worth the risk! I nominate “Dolemite” for the next SF social!!!! 🙂
“Open up your trunk, Dolemite.”
“There’s nothing in my trunk.”
“Open up your trunk!”
“There’s nothing in my trunk, man!”
“Open up the trunk!”
“There’s nothing in my trunk, man!”
“You’re under arrest!”
“What? You’re gonna have to TAKE ME!”
(delivers spin kick that lands at the officers knee and sends him flying back 10 yards)
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‘I do think this could have been good if they had had some moneys to bring in more talent, behind the camera and in front of it’ – not shit sherlock, this is true of pretty much every film
I come here for the insight
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Right. MM HMMM.
I enjoy you visiting here because this place needs a woman’s touch.
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That’s always the worst – when a film is really crappy but it does have the potential to be good. Sounds like a really frustrating watch!!
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It was pretty bad – and it sure could have used some light bulbs….
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So… is this a #NoBoobs or #Boobs thing?
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#NoBoobs ………..
😦 😦
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I’m always watching shitty movies, already got a couple of contenders for the next Shitfest!
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FUCKING SWEET!!!
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Dude! Lights are expensive geez you millionaire, such high expectations. lol
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You can STILL buy those cheap ones with the filaments in them!!!
#49centsforadozen
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HAHAHA!! Hey they were on a tight budget! They should have just used one of those flashlight apps for your phone.
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THERE YOU GO!!
OR
Even opening their flip phones to use the light from the screen!!
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Where do you find these? I think the hole in the ground you find these gems runs even deeper than the ones I look in.
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LOL – NetFlix – home of the bowels of DVDs in the United States
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Oh, so what you’re saying is, with different lights, different camera, different actors, different story, and different boobs, this could have been a different film? LOL!
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YES!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
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Pappy
Sounds truly horrible
Kidney
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Kidney,
It was pretty rough.
Pappy
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“Because that’s what we all do, right? Right? RIGHT???!?!?!?!”
Umm…. Nope. ; )
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LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#liar
#pantsonfire
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I know you are, but…. What. Am. I???
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A Public Tosser.
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I’m SURE you are!
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NO!
NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
NO! NO!
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Lol. I’m going to call you Pee-Wee.
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If you do that I am going to call you the new “B” nickname.
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It would SO be worth it if it meant I could call you Pee-Wee! Lol!!!
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I don’t know if I’m 100% on this one…
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only you would try to lighten up a dark tub scene… HAHAHAHAHA
: )
XOXOXOXOXOX
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YOU KNOW IT!!!!!!!
XOXOXO
#forposterityyouknow
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Boo for #boobsyacantsee!
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LOL!
Love hearing from you today!
#missyou
🙂
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I’ve missed talking to you too. I need to get on WordPress more often even when I’m feeling guilty because I haven’t posted anything, cause there’s so much good shit to read.
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You do! I saw you posted something today but I am about out for being online for a while. I’ll have to check it out tomorrow.
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Yeah, listen to a few minutes at least. You can hear me being southern and drunk talking about that movie where the lady has sex with a goat!
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Ha ha!! THAT movie!!! Black Candles……………..
🙂
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It was too dark to see The Boobs?! I thought Shitfest was over!!! 😉
#woeiseric
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Hmmm. Needed better lighting, cameras, actors and directors. Hmmmm. Sounds pretty far from savable. 🙂
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LOL – I try to be optimistic so maybe we could have all worked together to make something happen if we had some bread.
I’m old – so by bread – I mean “Money” 🙂
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Turns out, I’m old too. So I knew exactly what you meant. 🙂
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I thought so – but I always try and keep everyone educated 🙂
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Now I’m curious. I’m 35. How much older are you?
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Sounds suitably shitty.
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LOL! Yes.
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DTs?? Dick Thumbs?
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Yes. Exactly.
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