Isaacs Picture Conclusions

I SPIT ON YOUR CORPSE (1974) TWO TOP HATS

Here’s an oooooooooooold post that I had some fun with 🙂
corpse2

In the wonderful Netflix streaming queue, this is called “I Spit on Your Corpse” but if you want to look it up on IMDB you’ll find it under “Girls for Rent”. I think the latter is probably more apt since this really doesn’t have anything to do with malevolent revenge and spitting on corpses. “I Spit on Your Grave” (which came out four years later) at least has to do with bloody revenge for something terrible. This is basically a poorly made, badly acted, weird chase movie that does involve, at the beginning, “girls for rent”. This movie was strange, and I don’t mean “70’s psychedelia strange”. I mean the production was terrible, the story was kind of stupid, the actors and actresses were all pretty downright ugly except for one and it was too long. I guess I shouldn’t expect too much from a movie with this title. I mean – I would give this a “D”.

To be honest, the opening credits were kind of cool (which gave me my higher expectations). Then we explore a truck dropping off a bunch a barefoot and bedraggled, nose picking, braless women who constitute a chain gang, raking and hoeing and carrying pipes for some sort of irrigation system at the craggy base of some mountain range. (Does it get any better than that, right?) Soon enough, two of them get into a poorly staged fight to distract the guards and one of them makes a run for it. I was thinking how bad it would have been for this poor girl running through those rocks and thickets but, oh wait, she clearly has shoes on now. I was also admiring the very nice “score” and “sound effects” – just kidding. The escapee makes it over the hill to a chick waiting for her – she’s been sprung by “The Man”, the head of “The Syndicate” (the syndicate rents girls for whatever a man needs, like dope, a secretary, some sex, knock people off, etc), who wants her to be his new VP of operations (really), oh and pull a hit on this local lawyer who’s running for mayor and may give up the operation.

This lady’s name is Erica and she’s one tough cookie. She brings the girl who freed her and the local hooker, Donna (a very attractive actress) to the hotel room and they poison the man. Donna didn’t know this was in the plans so she books it out to Mexico. Well The Man doesn’t like this at all so he sends Erica and her girlfriend after her. Over the next good hour they keep missing each other at a particular gas station, encounter one brain cell hillbillies, studly campers, kill a hitchhiker (after ripping her shirt off mind you) and even do some bad ass kung fu fighting against a group of dudes who want some lovin’ to fix their radiator. Also – Erica has sex with some dude who wears a rope for a belt and doesn’t know what his pee-pee is for, then shoots him in the head. WHAT.

Eventually Donna and her saving angel camper stud are tracked into some more mountains, shot at for while and Donna is, sadly, killed after all we’ve been through – sorry for that spoiler. For real, the last ten minutes make this entire movie where the camper dude chases Erica and some thug through the mountains – they in a sedan and he in a dune buggy! Spoiler – eventually he runs them down, shoots the gas tank and everything explodes. It was pretty funny good. Oh well – you did what you could do with a few bucks in the early 70’s, I suppose. I suppose I have seen worse, I guess.

34 comments

  2. Zoë

    Kindest TGMJS,

    “…doesn’t know what his pee-pee is for, then shoots him in the head. WHAT.” – what the hell have you been watching lately? I mean really?!

    Also, you really and truly have seen worse. And again, we thank you for this!

    Love,

    JB

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. Monkeyboy

    So what’s the actual plot? I still couldn’t really figure it out even after reading every single word of your review. I’m not saying your review is at fault, far from it, it just seems like a film where a bunch of stuff happens.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • theipc

      That’s about it – some chicks escape from prison, go hook themselves out, kill a few dudes and get chased through the woods to a fiery death.

      WIN!!!

      Like

      Reply

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