You know, I’m not the type of guy who hates sequels or prequels or remakes or that terrible word “reboot” because I’ll watch almost anything and don’t care what version of a movie it is, as long as it’s fucking good. Like – I thought PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3 was the best of the bunch and I LOVED the newest EVIL DEAD while I didn’t really love the first three. Sure there’s some nostalgia from being a kid but they’re really not THAT good – especially the very first one. So – anyway – I ordered up the both of these a while back and watched the first one and the remake HERE and then finally gave this a shot and………. this was really fucking stupid.
Despite being clearly fucking killed at the end of the first one, O’Quinn is back and, indeed, alive and living in one of those fancy Insane Asylums and building fucking birdhouses and one day he gets the itch to escape so he kills his only friend and walks out of there like Security Guards have never been invented and, despite having no money or any sort of ID, and despite being a known murderer, buys a house in the middle of some suburban development and takes up shop being a counselor to middle aged women who are having problems because they have to give Blow Jobs to their husbands while humming Broadway show tunes.
Soon, he shacks up with Meg Foster and her dopey kid who doesn’t know how to throw a baseball and one night she wants to make The Sex but he wants to wait until they’re married and she doesn’t find this fucking weird at all that a grown man does NOT want to make The Sex to a hot broad so she agrees to get married.
While all of this bullshit is going on, the only sane character in this whole fucking thing is a Postwoman who breaks the laws of the United States and reads his mail before she delivers it and comes to the fucking conclusion that the Doctor’s name he is using is actually the name of a black fellow so he’s not who everyone thinks he is so he kills her and a few other people. That reminds me of a funny story… in 1990, before JB was born, Scrotey and I and a few other folks drove down to South Padre, TX for Spring Break. We were only 18 so we couldn’t buy booze legally or get into clubs but no one really cared out on the beach. One night we decided to try and get in a club so I borrowed this dude’s ID and we stood in line for an hour and then got to the door guy and I showed him my ID and he laughed and let me in for giving it a shot. You see – the picture on the ID I used was a black fellow and I’m a total white honky cracker.
But back to the movie… you know what? Fuck this movie. Two top hats because Meg Foster was a smoking hot act back in the day.
On another note – for some of you Long Term Most Beloved Readers guess what I got in the mail???? A FUCKING GIALLO!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!! GIALLORAMA BABY!!!!!!
If anyone was curious what that’s all about, you can check out a bunch of posts at this link HERE!
Haha, another great review 🙂
totally agree about remakes, reboots, sequels etc as well. As long as it’s good I’ll watch it. And who really cares!!!!!
#boobs
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THANK YOU!!!!!
I think some people just don’t like sequels just because….
Screw that!!
#jugs
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Because they’re up on their own arse.
No problem! It’s true, you always make me laugh 🙂 and somehow, weirdly, I still get a good idea about what to expect from the movie! Best of both worlds.
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WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
#validated
#safeword
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Wish I cast a black man for the movie now.
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Maybe we can incorporate it into the full feature…..
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Haha I don’t know why but I read that title as the sequel to father of the bride. Wow that was one hell of a brain fart ;D
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Nice!
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My Dearly Beloved Sinner Spock Chop,
You tried to use a black fellow’s ID to get your hulking 6’4″ white frame into a club? I like that the bouncer let you pass!
Love,
JJB
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My Fairest JB,
LOL!!! Isn’t that funny???
Love,
PSC
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PSC,
Sure is a great story to tell!
Love,
JJB
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SJB,
:)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Love,
SSC
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YOU’RE NOT MY REAL FUCKING DAD, ERIC!!
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THIS IS BULLSHIT.
Prepare for a call from Jerry Springer.
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Eric… you ARE the father!
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My Seed has found Purchase!
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Is Make Room for Daddy the actual subtitle?
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It sure is, my child!
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Love it.
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Love you.
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XO
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SMOOCHES
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I know , right… shocking… a new identity… with money, new career, house, etc. , all in , how many months? Did the movie say how long it took him to acquire all that ?
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I’ve always wanted to watch the first one, at least. I’m gonna, dammit!
Hey – one of those giallo thingies? I read a bunch of your reviews of those! Yay me! : )
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FUCK YEAH!!! I love these things!!!
Thank you for reading, it is very appreciated!
Squeezes,
Plonker
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(Sung like a soccerxxxx ne futbol chant)…Giaaaaaaaa aaa llo aaa lo aaa lo — GIALLO!!
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GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I love giallo films so I’m interested to see what arrived in the mail! Nice going with the fake ID though. Nothing better than a bemused security guard.
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Anna!
Did you happen to check out that link I posted?? I LOVE Giallos! I did a whole bunch of them before NetFlix ran out…
I got The Perfume of the Lady in Black with Mimsy Farmer! YUM! 🙂 : ) : )
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I can’t wait to read your review on that one! It’s one of the best Italian horror movies ever made. A real movie, not glorious trash.
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I’m getting ready to pop it in!
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Well, ya know, back when this movie was made it was easier to change identities. I had at least five of em between 89 and 94.
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And easier to come up with some big bucks to live in a fancy suburb?????
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In the late 80s? They were lettin all the riff raff in!
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LOL
True!!
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Who’s the daddy??!!! To quote Ray Winstone.
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Jack Burton. Me!
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Make room for Pappy! #truehorror
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The truest horror!!!!
#Pappy
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Eric! Have you seen Berberian Sound Studio? It’s a giallo film inside a horror film, and it’s smashing!
Adam.
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I haven’t yet. It got released here a while back but it was purchase only…..! I’m on it!!! Btw I watched “the perfume of a woman in black” and loved it. I also watched Killer Mermaid with Franco Nero. I miss The Fifth Cord.
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Excellent, hope you enjoy it! Man I really need to get more into the genre, it all looks and sounds so good!
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I loved it!! Strange ending….
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Great! Ha, yeah – goes a bit mental, right?
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I was totally NOT expecting them to eat her…. after all of that…they eat her lol so weird…
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Oh noooo!!! You continued the Stepfather series even after that screen full of O’Quinn dong??? You brave, brave soul…
#braveprobie
#dingDONG
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I like the back story.. back before JB was even born.. LOL!!!!!!!
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RIGHT!??!!!?? HA HA HA!!!!
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Yes BACK in the day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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