I remember being really excited about this thing when it came out. It was produced by Alexandre Aja who fucked some serious shit up in HIGH TENSION and had the babe from THE WOODS in it – as displayed prominently on the movie poster there. I failed to make it to the movie theater to see if but rented it one night on a digital video disc and smoked some grass and watched it even though I’ve never touched the stuff and I didn’t like it too much. I remember thinking “why can’t this broad just get out of the mother fucking parking garage already” and “when is her top going to come off” and “god damn, I need some cookies or something” but I recently queued it up again and gave it a watch and –
– I think this thing is OK but it’s not going to be anyone’s favorite horror movie. I also think “why can’t she just get out of the fucking parking lot already” and “oh yeah, her boobs never pop out of that dress” and also – “fuck, that’s that fucking guy who filmed a fucking sack in ‘AMERICAN BEAUTY‘”.
So, yeah. I chick with enormous boobs works in an office building and on Christmas night the entire thing shuts down like Fort Knox and she can’t get out of the parking garage. Or out the front doors. Or the back doors. Or out a window. Or the fire escape. And, naturally, since she’s at the bottom of a parking garage, her cell phone doesn’t work. Also, naturally, the security guard drugs her, changes her clothes and tries to have Christmas dinner with her. He also gruesomely murders someone because the person tried to kiss Nichols on the mouth in an elevator. I guess he showed him!
Aside from the horrendous lack of boobs popping out of dresses, this is quite gory in some places but kind of dumb in others. Like – that sure is a nice, freshly prepared Christmas dinner he cooked up in his security guard station. And – he sure was able to get her dress size right even though they have never met. And – did they really just have a high speed chase through a parking garage??
Oh well – I’ve seen worse, I suppose. At least googling P2 Movie got me some of this:
Kindest PSC,
NOPE, not watching this, three top hats or not. Doesn’t seem worth it to me!
Hope you have a great “Monday” Tuesday!
Love,
JJB
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SJB,
Sounds like a plan – there’s nothing too special about this one, to be sure.
THANK YOU!!!! fucking work. CRY CRY CRY!!!!!
Love,
SSC
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SSC,
You will survive this, trust me!
Love,
JJB
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IJB,
Guess what???
Shooting some footage this afternoon!!!!
Love,
ISC
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ISC,
It cannot wait!
IJB
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Dearest SBJB,
My cameraman got busy and nothing was done. Hopefully today.
Love,
GPSC
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Dear SSC,
Hopefully, hopefully.
Love,
JJB
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SSB,
Go, Go, Buffalo!!!
Love,
ISC
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PSC,
LOOOOOOOL!
JJB
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I’ve seen this! Thought it was pretty good 🙂
Her boobs were outrageous though, I don’t even mean by IPC standards, I mean generally!!! I watched it with my dad and I had to say something in the end because it just embarrassing! He just laughed and said he was enjoying the show.
Oh P.S sorry I WILL check out your film I promise Eric. I got home late last night, now I’m back at work – get the violins out!!!!! 🙂 🙂
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Hello friend!!
They really stole the show, didn’t they??? HA!!!! (o)(o)
#shame
GET ON IT!!!!!
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They actually did!!!
I will do, promise. Sorry!!!
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#ImNotComplaining
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P.S the girl with the boobs – she was also the saucy babysitter in Amityville Horror remake. The one who turned up without wearing a top (almost)
How’s your pen?
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You know what?? I’ve never seen that remake!!!
#onit
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And the original didn’t have a bearded Ryan Reynolds chopping wood with an axe whilst topless (the ultimate cliché but who’s complaining?)
#onitlikesonic
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So, you’re more of a topless Reynolds lady than a Brolin girl???
🙂
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YES!!! 🙂
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I understand.
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They should call this “B2.” The “B” is for “boobs.” Two of them.
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I like the way you think. If only they talked…..
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We should do that again!
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Sounds good!
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You only ever have one thing on your mind! 😦 Er… Two things, I mean.
I saw this! Um. Don’t remember it that well. American Beauty was better. 😉
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American Beauty?????????????!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!!!
I….. I….. I…………………….
#whatsyourdamage ????
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American Beauty is good!
#didyouhaveabraintumorforbreakfast ????
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I’ll use a term my dad used when I was a kid….
American Beauty is “bunk”…..!
#thatmademelaugh
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You have to love a Heathers reference!
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You know it, baby!!
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Sweet titty; sweet sweet titty.
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#sweettitty
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Never seen this. But literally just laughed out loud when reading this review. I would watch just to see the sheer stupidness of how she cant escape a parking lot ! 😀
Great review!
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I know! Ha! How about she tries the fire escape??????
Thanks for the comment, Melissa!!!
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Haha no luck with the fire escape ? LOOL priceless 🙂
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Awesome : )
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I like how they painted the wall behind the girl in the poster. The red paint looks quite nice. So does the concrete. And the shadow. But that’s about it.
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HAHAHAHAHA!!! I never noticed!! That shadow!!!! That’s a new level of SUCK!!
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I quite liked this one, in spite of the outrageous cleavage, rather than because of it. I do love a festival horror film, and this is far from the worst.
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Excellent!!!! I liked it for the most part but thought some of it was a little dodgy.
#shitonit
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I have two rating scales in my mind – a horror scale, and a general scale. On the general scale I guess this wouldn’t do so well, but as a horror (compared to all the really shit films they churn out) I thought this was pretty OK.
#Iprobablywouldn’tshitonit
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Sounds like…not my thing. Jesus, it’s Christmastime and that poor girl is wearing THAT?? Santa needs to get that woman a sweater. Although I get the feeling that then you might knock this down to two stars… 😉
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LOL – there IS a certain draw to this film….
#nosweaters
#heavingbosom
#proby
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