Hello! You know, it’s going to be hard to put this post together since these movies are almost 100% different. Thinking about them, I think the only two things they have in common AT ALL are: a shopping mall, a guy bitten by a zombie waiting to turn so his friend can shoot him, a bunch of caucasians and a non-caucasian, at least one truck with the logo “BP” painted on the side (not sure if that’s the British Petroleum people who flooded the Gulf Mexico with oil and killed everything or not) and the undead (who are TOTALLY different). I know this is one of my friend’s FAVORITE zombie movies and I would sure hate to lose a friend over this, but I thought the new one was a TON better. I’m not trashing the old one or saying it sucks or anything, I’m just saying the new one is more –> me.
Here’s me checking if it’s safe:
Well, I haven’t heard anything back, so let’s proceed. Let’s look at the first one. Set the “day of” the NOTLD, we find some people working at a TV news station covering the big outbreak from NOTLD. A lot of people are smoking cigarettes – up to and including the lead lady who’s pregnant. Everything’s gone apeshit and her boyfriend has commissioned a helicopter to get them the fuck out of there. Elsewhere, some sort of S.W.A.T. team busts into a building like they own the place and start shooting everyone. The violence is all there and the gore is pretty sick for 1978.
I honestly don’t remember how the TV crew and the cops meet up but they do and they ‘copter over the carnage and eventually land on the top of some mall and hole up there. There, they smoke lots of cigarettes and shoot the living dead and play a bunch of cards and hot wire BP trucks and drink whiskey and try on coats and this and that and this and that until….
.. a fucking biker gang breaks into the mall…. Again – I hope I don’t lose a friend over something so small as this but…. the biker gang gets in and they have a fucking pie-in-the-face-fight over Benny Hill music…
I couldn’t even believe it. I was enjoying this for the most part and then this? Again – Mystery Friend – I am NOT trashing this movie but REALLY? I was liking this a lot until that. Thankfully that didn’t last too long and we moved on to more pressing matters. I liked how it ended but, man, that pie fight scene really pissed me off.
In the newest one, Sarah Polley (who I generally like except for the pain that is SPLICE) is a nurse getting off work at the local hospital in Wisconsin somewhere. Things are getting nuts in there but she’s been on past her shift and it’s time to fucking go, already. She goes home and bones her husband in the shower and they go to sleep in orgasmic sleepiness. Soon, this neighborhood kid busts into their Fornicatin’ Room and bites her husband and he goes insane and tries to eat his wife so she escapes through the bathroom window and gets the fuck out of there. I’m a big fan of the “camera attached to the moving car” shot and this one pulls it off pretty good – that scene where she’s driving away from the house and shit’s exploding everywhere and everything else really, REALLY works for me. I love it!
Eventually she crashes her car and wakes up later to Ving Rhame’s gun in her face and they passively form a friendship because she’s not dead and they meet up with Jake Weber and
NAS Mekhi Phifer and his pregnant squeeze and head to the local shopping mall for safety. There, Rhames grumbles and growls and and a security team lead by Michael Kelley try and stymie their advancement in the mall but (lol – butts are fun) things all work out and everyone gets happy and they have a big fucking hippie love fest orgy in a JC Penny’s.
Absolutely none of that last sentence happens except for the grumbling and growling but, for real, I liked this movie a LOT. I remember when I rented it so long ago I watched it twice in one weekend and loved pretty much everything about it except for the god dammed stupid zombie baby.
That was absolutely fucking stupid and unnecessary and just dumb. Aside from that I l really liked everything they did here AND – I even liked the music in it.
You know, it is what it is and we are who we are and we like what we like and we do what we do but I just didn’t love the original. I didn’t hate it or anything but I think I was spoiled by seeing the new one first. You now what I hated?? The Day of the Dead remake!!!!! Coming here – next Monday! That was one of the shittiest movies I’ve ever seen.
Speaking of zombies – check out what MRS. THE IPC got me for our anniversary!!!