Isaacs Picture Conclusions

SHITFEST 2015: ABDUCTION (2011)

SHITFEST2015

THIS ENTRY SUBMITTED BY THE YUMMY:

mrmovielogo

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Abduction (2011)

So, a couple of weeks back, my writing partner, S-Littner and I were ready for a solid night of entertainment, preparing ourselves to start the sexy new season of the anime Highschool DxD. Those familiar with the series probably know exactly what we were anticipating. But those who don’t know anything about the concept and whatnot, these couple of images should give you a vague idea as to what this action-packed show is all about:

HSDXD1HSDXD2

Anyway, one thing lead to another and we strangely decided against DxD for the evening — I can’t remember why — but eventually agreed to check out the 2011 flick Abducted, starring Taylor Lautner and Lily Collins, in the hope of seeing some of this goodness:

LC

Bad move. Firstly, no one — and I mean absolutely no one — gets ‘abducted’ in the entire film, whatsoever. Whoever green-lit this fucking title should actually pick up a dictionary and look up the meaning of the word. Srsly!

Secondly, Lily Collins had way too much fucking clothes on, and the entire film was filled with this shit …

ABDUCTGIF

… and plenty of this …

llama

Thirdly, instead of attempting to write a detailed analysis of the dreadful motion picture, this gif pretty much sums up my entire traumatic experience:

abductgif2

I did however come to the realisation that even if I had watched Abducted backwards, Taylor Lautner would still look like a llama.

Also, Anna Kendrick is hawt.

HSDXD5

By Mr. Movie 🙂

HSDXD3

53 comments

  1. Haha very funny!!!!! Love the ‘mouthy’ gif !!!!!

    And no abduction in a movie called Abduction? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

    Maybe they abducted the script and/or any good ideas and that’s what they meant by the title? Shame they didn’t abduct Lily Collins clothes, that would have cheered you up!

    I’m not sure what I think of Taylor Lautner. My eyes say yes, my heart says no….

    Liked by 3 people

  2. When I saw the title I thought “Oh, I’ve never seen this one.”
    Then when I saw Lautner I realized I had. I just can’t remember a single thing about it.
    May you be so lucky as to have it scrubbed from your memory soon.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. LOL. I cannot stop laughing at the Taylor Lautner mouth gif. Perfection. You know, I distinctly remember hearing about this film and thinking, “Y’know, this would probably be a good Shitfest choice.” So well done, sir. Also, that cat gif is pretty wonderful for all of Shitfest. Spot-on summary of our collective feelings.

    Liked by 1 person

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