The majority of this site, for better or worse, is to watch and talk about the shittiest movies on the planet or, more importantly, hold a SHITFEST which people seem to enjoy. I also tend to prefer stuff off the radar – like independent films to talk about, because the big mainstream blockbusters are usually covered by other people and what could I say that would be a draw that hasn’t already been said (thus the point of the Half Ass Reviews feature). Also – I think I’m known for making posts about movies that have nothing to do with the movie in question, but, occasionally, I do come across something good and feel obligated to report on it – mainstream or not – and this is one of those things. I absolutely loved this fucker and, if it wasn’t for IT FOLLOWS, this would be my favorite film of the year so far.
Since I care about you, Most Beloveds, let’s get something straight. We all know that my favorite type of movie is something with a load of blood and loads of boobs – sure – got it. But I also like things like this. This movie is slow and takes place in a small town. There’s no action, so to speak and it’s really character driven. There’s no boobs and it takes its deliberate time to get to the point. I don’t know if anyone ever watched BAD TURN WORSE after I talked about it but, if you liked that movie, you’re sure to like this one. Aside from the excellent acting, even from the pumpkin-ish Bruce Dern : ) the plot and story is excellent and I just loved it.Much like BAD TURN WORSE, or even RED ROCK WEST or AFTER DARK, MY SWEET, a plan is set in motion and things continue to get considerably worse as the story rolls on – but – in this movie we get thrown a second story – involving a missing package and it’s really just kind of fucking awesome how the two stories intertwine and finish up together. Top Hats off to the director and writer (as well as the cast and DP) – this is an excellent product that I’ll watch over and over again.
Again – before my Most Beloved spends their hard earned money on this – this is a “small town crime” movie – there’s no explosions and slow motion hip-hop dancers gyrating around. This is slow and purposeful and deliberate. For a movie without boobs and blood, this is my kind of thing, all the way. Loved it!
#lunchbox
Sounds good! Nice cast as well 🙂
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Clam!!!
It IS good!!!
Love Pen!
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Love Pen!
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Yay! Forever and ever #pens
Love Clam

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HAPPY THURSDAY!!!!!!!
Love Pen!
O _ o o _ O
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YAY!!! (and guess what Pen?)
It’s my Friday today, it’s bank holiday over her (I’ve mentioned it once or twice….) and I’m not back at work UNTIL NEXT TUESDAY! 🙂 🙂
O _ o o _ O
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WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CLAM!!!!!
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! – Although – if you’re gone from me I sure will miss you!!!!
Love Pen!!!
O _ o o _ O
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No never!!!! I will be here 🙂 and on twitter, definitely 🙂 it’s 4 days – WAAAAAY too long to be without Pen & the Gang! I’d go mad!!!!!!!!!
Love Clam!
O _ o o _ O
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Best news I’ve heard all day!!!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
Love Pen!!
O _ o o _ O
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Sounds promising! Thanks for the review. For the life of me, I cannot find the time to go to the theatres and now there are two movies that I want to see. It’s a hard life I live.
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HA!! I hope you get a chance to see it – at home or in the theater : ) : )
You do have a hard life…… : )
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I will for sure. I just suffer from RFN (right f****** now). Patience is not my strong suit.
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HAHAHAHA!!! You’re pretty awesome!
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Haha, thanks! I do my best.
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You do it well!!!
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Sweetest Pappy
Although not my favorite Hemsworth, I sure don’t mind some Liam.
Love,
Kidney
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Sweetest Kidney!!
I don’t think you could go wrong here, Hemsies or not!
Love,
Pappy!
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Dearest PSC,
Looks like a solid film, might have to check it out!
Love,
JJB
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Dearest and Warmest SJB,
Yes. Please do. It would be very happy!
Love,
IPSC
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Dear PSC,
Email me so I remember!
Love,
IJB
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Dearest SJB,
Will do!!
Love,
ISC
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Brilliant review Eric, definitely looks like a movie I’d watch.
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This thing was great!! I hope you like it!
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Thanks for the recommendation.
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Always!
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You’re one reliable dude man.
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I do try!
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And you definitely succeed man. Plus, you can’t be beaten for boob content.
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WHOOP WHOOP and TIT TIT!!
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Tit Tit indeed.
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HAHAHAH!
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I like this movie, the ending is a highpoint. Clever. And sticks with you, like a Life Lesson you never asked for. Very fitting, if you live in Cut Bank. And want more than anything to leave.
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Hey – thank you very much for looking out here! I thought this was great! You from around there?
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Sounds like a pretty decent flick. Will have to keep an eye out for it.
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Sounds good!
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Teresa Palmer is a cutie pie, and Michael Stuhlbarg is criminally underrated as an actor, as much as John Malkovich is incredibly overrated.
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You know, I’m not a big fan of Malkovich at all but he was pretty good in this….
And yes – Palmer can Palm my Palmer any day!
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You’ll have to fight me for her, hehe.
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HAHAHA!!
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No you can have her Eric, bros before hoes.
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No it’s cool – you’re young and deserve it! I’ll go with Marley Shelton : )
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Excellent choice Eric. Thank you for giving me your permission to love Miss Palmer. Have fun with Marley.
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It’s a date!
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We could always engage in a certain group activity, haha.
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HAHA!!
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Just find a motel and we’ll invite the chicks.
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I only skimmed through the review since I didn’t see this one yet. I saw you mentioned Bad Turn Worse and that you liked it. I watched it on netflix last week, and thought it started out well, but then it became a bit dull to me. It was late at night and I fell asleep halfway through and went to bed, and I just could never bring myself to finish it. I guess I just didn’t really care what happened next. I didn’t really like any of the characters since they were all dishonest, etc. Everyone was a liar. And it just felt like it was going in the same direction as other similar films about people crossing one another. I am willing to bet one of the 3 characters contacted Big Red to make a deal and at the end Big Red was working with one of the main trio – and likely crosses them, as well. Or something.
Anyway, point being, with that in mind, do you think I’d like this Cut Bank film? Or that if one didn’t like BTW they wouldn’t care for this one, either?
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HMMMMMMMM You might think this is a little slow too…. maybe wait for it for free….
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I don’t mind slow. A lot of films I love are fairly slow. I thought BTW was dull b/c it felt predictable. I will give this Cut Bank a shot, though. I’ll probably wait till it hits netflix or Amazon Prime.
BTW, I watched this horror movie called “Cam2Cam” on netflix last week. It’s TOTALLY up your alley! I think you’d be a big fan. Highly recommend for you.
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i know you don’t mind slow – you might think is predictable too….
I keep seeing Cam2Cam all over the place – you think I’d like it?
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Oh yeah, 99.9% sure you will love it. As I was watching it I was thinking I needed to let you know about it b/c it seems like your kind of film. It’s on netflix instant.
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Cool. I’ll check it out then : )
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Nah! Wrong Hemsworth. 😉
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Hmmmmmmmm #wanker !!!!!!
#wanker
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Sweet review! I’ll be sure to check it out 🙂
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I hope you like it!!!!
#hope #grope #soap
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#soapygrope
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#mondaymorninggropes
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#mondayafternoongropes
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#illtakethemthankyou
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#lookafterthem
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#lockedupinmycellar
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#coveredinplastic
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#regularygroped
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Great cast here. I never heard of this one, but I do love your review 🙂 Forget Hemsworth! I want me some Billy Bob!
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Score!!! I hope you like it if you ever get a chance!
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Shit on it, this isn’t on UK Netshits or LoveFilm by post. Yet another one I’ll have to wait for, Will defo see it when I can though.
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Shit on it!!!
I hope you like it!
#shitonit
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Woah, a serious post mate? Have you lost sleep? 😉
I’m glad you enjoyed this man, cos I freaking LOVED it. Did you get a Coen vibe from it? Several times my friend said ‘this has to be a Coen movie!!’ and I couldn’t disagree. Eccentric characters, a small cosy town, noirish story… hell if this aint a tribute to the Coens (and Fargo more specifically) then I dunno what is!
My only problem with the film was I thought Malkovich was slightly miscast. He did great, but its not the type of role he excells at
Peace bro
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FUCK YEAH, Jordan!!! This thing was all kinds of good and very Coen-y – loved it!
How about that dude’s basement???
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Hell yeah, and that dude with the glasses… its the lead guy from the Coen’s a serious man!! Utterally unrecognisable!
W-w-w-where….is my p-p-p-parcel?
Creeeepy. Such A coen-like character!!
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YEP YEP! I loved the slow shot from the trailer to out in the shed – didn’t see that coming…
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Fuck man, I didn’t see -anything- coming ion this movie!! Very well written.
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Yessir – very good movie!
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Sounds totally worth checking out!
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Oh, it is, Mama, it is!
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That is a good cast. Colour me intrigued! Nice work EI!
#intriguies
#hemsworthies
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WOO HOO!!!!
#moviesies
#goodsies
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John Malkovich AND a Hemsworth, you say??? …Okay, I’m sold. 🙂
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WHAT!!! YES!!!
#goodit
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finally saw this Eric. Sent you an email!
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I don’t see an email, my brother… I even checked my spam…. : (
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WHAT!!!! i sent it to ei@theipc.com
just resent it
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it’s ei@theipc.me my man! “.me” : )
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silly me. 😦
resent again to .me
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Got it!
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