I REALLY wanted to like SPRING more than I did – especially after reading about it HERE – but I didn’t and despite how good it looks and the icky special effects, this suffered – to me – from the thing I hate most (aside from tires screeching on dirt roads and cell phones with dial tones) – too much fucking talking…. I think I’ll probably be in the minority of people who think this is boring but this site is about honesty and I was really bored throughout the whole thing and I kept having to listen to the lead talk and talk and talk and talk. Then we he’s done talking he does some more talking. Again – this thing looks absolutely fantastic and the effects are very good but….. yeah….. talkie talkie talkie. I would also suggest that a lot of people will probably really like this but I just couldn’t get into it, really. I have a feeling this post will sound like I hated it, but I really didn’t, I just don’t think I need to see it again.
The guys that did the wonderful RESOLUTION are back with more money and (I think) a helicopter, weaving a love story between a incessantly talking American youth and a strikingly good looking Italian woman who may be the love of his life and may be a 2,000 year old shape shifting monster who feeds off of the living. Maybe. Of course, we always have to consider that any one of us could be a 2,000 year old shape shifting monster – especially THIS PERSON but we can’t live our lives in fear so we do what we must and we carry on and we mate and propagate the species and hopefully live happy, effective lives without going around murdering and eating anyone else.
Earlier I mentioned a helicopter. I do have to give it up for the DP or the directors because there’s some really beautiful, sweeping shots in this thing. The locations are beautiful and the early on special effects were quite good although I did have some issues with this strange CGI scene about midway through the thing:But then the talking continued and I got bored and fidgity and, since I was watching it on my iPad, I got a little grumbly because I couldn’t play my game while I was watching this thing. There’s a big money shot as we enter the last act and I’m going to spoil it here so step out the back if you’re interested in seeing this with a clean slate but:
Oh well – again, I didn’t hate it but I wanted more. More action, more monster, more killing, less talking. If you see this, I hope you like it but I was just – meh. *shrugs* To close this piece, here’s something I found looking up “spring movie gif”:
Too much talking like The Social Network? 🙂
Nice review Pen, shame you didn’t enjoy it more – that picture is a shocker! And with that, you’ve STILL sold it to me!!!!!!! Love Clam O _ o o _ O
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Clam!!!
Not quite as much talking as that goddamned Social Network fucking movie but it’s all there. Good luck, baby!!!!
Love Pen!!!
P.S. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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Prime Minister’s questions doesn’t have as much talking as The Social Shitting Network
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That fucking movie!!!!!!!
SHIT ON THAT!!!!
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Who loves ya, baby! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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YOU????????
Love Pen!!!!!!!!!
P.S. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ❤
Love Clam! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
P.S O _ o o _ O
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HAPPY WEDNESDAY TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love Pen!!!!!!!!!!!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
P.S. ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
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And to me!!!!!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂
Love Clam!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
P.S ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ (one extra!)
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#extras
Love Pen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. O _ o o _ O
P.P.S. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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#extras
#pens
P.S ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ !!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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#extras
#pensandclams
#ankleclicks
#seanpertwee
#loveclam
#XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Love Pen!!!
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I wonder if Sean Pertwee would be foxed and amazed if he knew we were hashtagging him!!! #seanpertwee
#pens #extras #lovepen
Love Clam! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx O _ o o _ O
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I bet he’d love it!!!
#seanpertwee
#extras
#guvnors
LOVE PEN!!!!!!!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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He would!!!
#dogsoldiers hee hee!! Xxxxxxxxxxxx
Love Clam!
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Clam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Happy Thursday!!!!!!!!!!! Fury Road tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love Pen!!!!!!
P.S. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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I am still eagerly looking forward to this. Love the gif. lol
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Good luck, my friend!! LOL – you’re welcome!
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I plan to see this one when it’s available online; hopefully I disagree with you.
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Good luck, captain! I know Rhino really liked this.
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Okay, so if he liked it I may like it. I like slow burners. But sometimes you do, as well. So, I really don’t know. I will see if I can find a copy online this week, so I can come back to this post and let you know.
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It’s a good looking movie – I just found it pretty boring and all of the talking was irritating (to me).
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That last screenshot looks pretty awesome! I shall give it a go but too much talking is kind of exhausting isn’t it? Sometime you just want to watch (watch being the operative word) a movie. Speaking of less talking, have you seen Upstream Colour? There’s an interesting take on storytelling. Not sure if I like it or not but there’s hardly any talking and it’s very unique and innovative. I’ll be doing a review on it as soon as I figure out how I feel about it, haha!
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It really is… can’t we just have some exciting visuals here…….? Blah blah blah blab blab blab. Enough!
I have not seen that! Should I make a note about it???
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Ummm…. I don’t know. Haha! I feel like it was good but it was so different… It’s not a typical narrative. I just though of it because you mentioned all the talking and Upstream Colour has so little talking. I’d like to get someone else’s opinion on it but I don’t want to be responsible if you hate it, haha!
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LOL – I watch the worst shit on the planet for this place so don’t worry about that!!!
#satanicbesties
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Haha! Ok, then yes, please watch it 🙂
#satanicbestiesforever
#dontsayididntwarnyou
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HA!!! I made a note!!!
#neverworry
#yourock
#satanicbestiesforever
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Mel & Isaacs, If fellow blogger Mark Hobin had an unclean list (he doesn’t; only Isaacs does) then “Upstream Colour” would have been on it. He absolutely detested that movie. Did you ever watch it, Isaacs?
Mel, this sounds like a film you should go visit the IMDB movie board to help you form an opinion and possibly offer more perspective.
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I did see UC. I thought the first third was brilliant, the second was too serious for its own good and then it petered out to the end…
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oh ok…
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Did you ever see Primer? It’s by that guy…
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I started Primer, but I was bored, so I stopped it.
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Primer was terrible
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I kept hearing how great it was, so I put it on and I was just like “Huh? This is boring as hell” and shut it off, never to return to it. Glad you agree. I thought you may actually be one of the ones who said it was great. If we want to watch an off-the-wall time-travel, multi-dimension film, we’ll stick with “Coherence”.
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Exactly! Coherence FTW every time!
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WHAT YOU SAYING ABOUT ME ERIC? WHY YOU CALLING ME A SLIMEY DEMON? WHY YOU TELLING EVERYONE MY SECRET? GOD DAMN IT. I TRY TO STAY AS A GRIM AND DISGUSTING DEMON FOR 2000 FUCKING YEARS AND YOU JUST OUT ME ON YOUR BLOG?! JESUS CHRIST.
Seriously though, I LOVE this review, you know why? Because I 100% agree. I adored Resolution – I mean I loved it so much I probably could have knocked one out to it (I didn’t), but yeah. So, I was all stoked for Spring and I was completely let down too. I understand it’s a slow burner etc, but it was BORING. The dialogue was so fucking lame. I really couldn’t get into it…. If I wanted to watch a love film, I’d just watch The Holiday. So yeah I agree, far too much talking. Chat, chat, chat about lame ass bullshit. There needed to be more monster action.
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BECAUSE I LOVE YOU IS ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Resolution was the tits! This movie – not so much. There DEFINITELY needed to be some more some more action in this thing.
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The Zobo shapeshifter comment was hilarious! LOL.
Essentially, this is a romance film; with a little horror tacked on. Sorry to disappoint you two blood-sucking freaks! 🙂
I thought “Resolution” was good, as well.
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Resolution – the two guys in the cabin? If that’s the one I liked that too : )
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Yeah, that’s it. Rhino recommended that one to me back in 2013, I think. 🙂
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Resolution was really good!
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Yeah, the horror is barely even there – it wasn’t really my kind of film. Too lovey haha! Resolution was far better.
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Exactly!!! I miss you!!!
#purposefultouching
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I miss you too! I’m back now! #lingeringhug
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#intentionalthightouching
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Bummer you didn’t enjoy it quite as much as me, but that’s usually pretty rare. Thanks for the linkage, man!
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Of course, you slut!
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Watch your mouth you dirty whore.
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My apologies!!!!! My site is just all about honesty………… and boobs.
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Great work here PSC! I will likely still check this out, too much talkie doesn’t bother me 🙂 Pity you didn’t like it more, looks like you really wanted to!
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JB!!! I sure did try!!!! Good luck with it!!!
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Awesome review Eric! I’m just sorry you didn’t like it more. That screenshot! Holy guacamole!😱
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Thank, my dear Kim!!! I tried!!!
Holy guacamole indeed!!!
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And you’re so appreciated for it!😊
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WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
#iappreciateyou
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Loove!!!
#manyhugs
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#superhugtuesday
#exclamationpointexclamationpoint
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You’re the best Eric! I hope your week is going okay so far. 🙂
#lovelylakeh
#squeezes
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So far, so good, sweet Kim!!!!
#onlytuesday
#squeezesqueeze
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Fingers crossed!
#loveeric
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WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
#lovekim
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#muchlovereturned
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How is your day going, my dear?
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Fair to middling. I don’t know why, but I’ve always liked that phrase! Thanks for asking. How about yours Eric?
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I like that phrase too! I also like: Don’t take any wooden nickles.
It’s going OK – I’m ready to go home for the day!!
#woodennickles
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Oh Gosh! My dad used to say that all the time! 🙂 I hope you have a lovely night.
#loveeric
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You too sweet Kim!!!!!!
#lovekim
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#relaxingnight
#manyhugs
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This one has intrigued me, I am not going to lie. Reminds me of an ex-girlfriend perhaps….
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a 2,000 year old monster????
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I like ’em experienced.
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Fair enough!
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Hmm, I’m sort of intrigued by this one. That octopus thing might have swung it. But then you were spot on re Tombstones… We’ll see…
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Maybe you’ll like it! There’s LOTS of talking….. I mean – a shit-ton of it.
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I don’t mind talking but a shit-ton sounds like A LOT. Like, maybe too much.
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I don’t think the guy ever shut his mouth. Even when they were having sex.
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Talky sex = just no
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Isn’t that just the worst?????
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#THEWORST
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#solame
#shutitalreadylady
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Ha!
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#putasockinit
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Do you guys say that?
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It’s a fairly common term around here. So is: I’d pay good money for him / her to shut up.
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Huh. I thought that one as quintessentially English.
#learningeveryday
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HA!!
If it was English, wouldn’t it be “stocking”?
#idontknowshitabouteurope
#stockingfeet
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Sounds like something I might like, though I love the honesty in your review. Really gives me a real sense of what the movie will be like. I gotta see this when I can
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Good luck, my friend!! I hope you love it!
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Damn these talkies and their talking!!! Why can’t we just go back to the good ol’ days with silent movies?!?! 😉
P.S. That octopus thing is bananas.
#xoxo
#youtrollop
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#toomuchdialogue
Let’s keep it simple!!
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Sprinnnggggggggggg Break mutha fckas.
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Damn right, baby baller!!!
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Spring Breakers sounds much better!
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YOU’RE A SPRING BREAKER!!!!!!
#tosser
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Ha! Like, the opposite of a spring breaker…. 🙂
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Spring Break forever bitches
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I just watched this. I agree there was a lot of talking and questions and explanations and I even dozed off a couple of times (I was a tad tired when watching) but overall I liked it. I like when horror blends w/ other genres effectively. I like Lou Taylor Pucci, as well, and feel he’s an underrated actor. He was in the Evil Dead remake, too. I liked him in this, and the girl was excellent. I give this a 7 out of 10.
*I also thought it had a nice score.
But how much better would it have been if it added some beepity doo-bop drum licks behind a cool, smooth saxophone!? 🙂
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If they had added some be-bop I might put this in Shitfest lol – J/K
I do like LTP though
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If they had added some bee-bop it would rightfully so go into SF. lol.
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