Hi there Most Beloveds!! In case you missed the announcement over the last week or so because it was your birthday and you got drunk for thirteen days OR if you were imprisoned in a dumpy jail in South Dakota, I’m now accepting submissions for SHITFEST 2015 ~ SUMMER. I want to run it in July, so the earliest you could get it to me, the better (for me). Here’s the basic rules:
- The contest will run as long as the entries keep coming in
- You can write about any genre from any year as long as you think it’s a piece of shit
- Make it fun – past winners have usually been people who write differently than their normal blog
- Be creative – it doesn’t have to be an essay – you can submit art, poems, videos, pictures, etc
- You don’t have to be a blogger to submit an entry
- At then end of the contest we will vote on our favorite posts
- The winner will receive a handsome trophy cast from the bowels of hell, coded with the most perfect evil
I am also requesting ANY help in creating graphics for this thing. Banners, header, thumbnails, posting on my day off, anything will help. I can’t pay you with anything but my gooey love so there’s that.
You can look at any of the previous glorious entries at the following links to get a hint about what you might want to do or be up against:
You can see miraculous trophy acceptance speeches at these links:
To enter – send me your post (or ask general questions) at ei@theipc.me ~ I’ll accept any format as long as I can open it. If you want to load your post up with loads of pictures, that’s fine, just indicate where you want them placed in the post. I think that’s it – let me know if you have any questions. In case you missed it, here’s the trophy:
Again – at the end of this thing we’ll all vote You’ll email me your five favorite posts at ei@theipc.me and I’ll assign a point value –
1st Place Vote = 5 Points
2nd = 4 Points
3rd = 3 Points
4th = 2 Points
5th = 1 Point
Then I’ll tally them all up for a week and announce the winner of the world’s most coveted trophy! You don’t have to be a blogger to vote!
BRING IT BITCHES!!!
P.S. Luke claims he’s going for back to back wins………
****
Also – I would hate to go without some thoughts on a movie so look back here in 8 hours and 15 minutes from the time of this post for something AMAZING!!!! Set your clocks!! Synchronize those watches! Unbuckle those petticoats!
Let’s do this thing!
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We’ll rock AND roll!!
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As soon as I get out of this South Dakota jail, I’m working on it!
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Good luck!!! Fucking South Dakota……
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bring it!!!
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Let’s go!!! Engage!!!
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Tnx Picard!
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I thought you’d like that!
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Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!
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WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!
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where was I last week…ah yes…worst hangover ever…anyway yay! Great news!
I’ll do my best to come up with something creative.
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Those boilermakers will sneak up on you every time!!
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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This is so exciting!☺️
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Can you feel the electricity?????
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Absolutely!
#totallyepic
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#sweetsweetkim
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#hugs
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Hugs!!
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Happy Wednesday Eric! Are you more awake today?
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Much better today!!! How about you??
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Yay! I however need a lobotomy 😦
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BOO!!!!! : (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
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Sigh.
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#lovekim !!!
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Sorry for the incessant moaning!
#hugs
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You can moan to me!
#lovekim
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Ha! Thank you my friend!
# loveeric
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Always!!!
#sweetkim
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I am so going to win… surely… this time… stop rigging it against me Isaacs.
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Stop complaining of graft and vice – it’s up to the people!!!
Love,
Eric
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I wish the people would like me…
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Everyone loves you. You know this. Your pheromones make us.
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Well my Shitfest Summer entry is called ’50 shit films in 50 tweets’, so if I don’t win for that, I fuckin quit.
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You know – I’ve never won either……
: (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
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ERR MAH GHERD. I’m excited.
…. Now which movie to choose….
#satanicbestiesforever
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OHMYGOD I can’t even wait!!!!!!!!!!
#satanicbestiesforever
#creepsalways
#salsies
#existentialpigs
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I await your entry to the contest with great anticipation.
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So looking forward to this, my entry is gonna steam up screens everywhere.
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You know it : )
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People will be getting all kinds of hot and bothered reading it.
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Probably!
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That’s my aim for this Eric, nothing like giving people a sense of release.
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They’ll be releasing all over the place : )
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Hehe, let’s hope so.
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It will!
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Let’s hope they have something to clean up with afterwards.
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That post should come with a box of tissues.
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Do you really think it will get to those lengths?
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Anything can happen during shitfest!
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I wonder how many people I can get to jizz with my entry?
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I guess we’ll see….
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That will definitely be an interesting conversation when my post gets published.
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Gotta sign off now Eric, got a long hard night ahead of me.
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See ya!
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I’m back now brother.
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I hope you had a reasonable evening…
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Depends on your definition of reasonable.
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Reasonable = not terrible
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Oh it was far from terrible if you know what I mean.
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Great!
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I was very popular with the ladies.
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Even better!
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Must have been the police uniform I had on.
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HA!!!
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There’s something about a uniform isn’t there?
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Next time you should wear your sailor outfit : )
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Ha, I don’t actually own one. But do you think it would be a hit with Satrap’s audience?
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Be back on tomorrow boss, gotta sign off because of popular demand from Satrap’s fans.
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Check ya later!
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Poor choice of words to sign off there Vinnie
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I only just realisesd how dodgy it sounded.
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Shit yes!
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FUCK YEAH!
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I’ll get something to you on July 31st.
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Sounds great, you cocksucker.
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I may very well have to get involved this time.
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I would only ———> LOVE IT!
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I’m working on my entry! Was a little unsure of my pick at first but the crap and creep factor is so high that I think it will do!
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Bring it, lady!!!!!!!!
#bringit
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Will try!
#itsonlikedonkeykong
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YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!
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Oh, Eric! Thank you so much for doing this!! I think we all need a place to dump our shit and become better people afterwards! It’s like punching a punch-bag in the gym!!! so… YEAH! I just need to pick a god damn movie!!! :-)))
#summershitfestsmooooch
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Whatever you choose to review will be great Reut.
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Yes, as long as I get to trash something! 😉
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That’s the aim of the game.
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LET’S DO THIS, MY SWEET REUT!!!!!!
#shitfestforeversmooches
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Yes!!! #smoooooch 😊😊
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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
#smoooooooooooooooooooooch
x x x
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Honestly, this is the only good reason that we have different seasons.
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Yes sir!!
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Sweet! This summer just got a whole lot shittier! I am soooooo pumped for this. It will be my first Shitfest submission!
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I can’t EVEN WAIT!!!!!!
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Me too, brother! I just received my new ACME Box of Sarcasm in the mail and once it’s installed on my computer, I’m gonna rip up the shittiest movie I can find (of which I have already found!).
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AWESOME!!!!! We’ll rock this Shitfest like no other!
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And so it shall be!
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High fives and fist bumps!
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Fantastic Pen!!!!! Sorry I’ve been so quiet on The IPC recently, I WILL rectify soon and comment like mad!!!!!! ❤ ❤ ❤
#pensandclams
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Sounds like a good plan to me, my dear Clam!!!!
< 3 < 3 < 3 < 3 < 3
#extras
Love Pen!
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AWESOME!! Can’t wait for this! Haven’t seen anything shitty in a while, so will have to hunt for something. Yaayy!!
#foreverfriend
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YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! I was HOPING you’d see this!!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
#foreverfriend
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I’ll try! I still gotta figure out how to “photoshop” on a damn phone for what I have planned.
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WHO DOES SHIT ONLY on their phone????
#laptop
#youwanker
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ME! :-p
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……………..
#tinyfingers
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Bring. It. On.
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I’m totes in! And I think I finally know what I’m going to write about! But I’m having a writer’s block on creating images. Is there anything particular you’d want to see?
#shitfesties
#imagesies
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Oh – anything would work!!! I understand if you can’t get around to it – we’ll still always be:
#shitfesties and
#thronesies
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Fuck yeah! I am so looking forward to this. I have a movie lined up that I KNOW cannot be good, my neighbour is preparing himself (he recommended it so he has got to watch it with me – I think he is more interested in seeing my reaction first hand). WHOOP! Fun times ahead Giuseppe!
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Giuseppe,
I CAN’T WAIT!!!! Go go buffalo!
Giuseppe
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WHOOP!
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I got up early to write a post for my Friday Night Movie Recommendation before I go camping and then I came over here to see what I was up against for Shitfest and somehow 2 hours just passed. Good Grief.
I’m really indecisive, competitive and I’m a perfectionist… put all these things together and it’s gonna take me forever to submit an entry. Muuuusttttt wiiinnnnn…. haha!
#satanicbesties
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I can’t wait for your entry!!!!!
#wednesday : (((((((((((((((((((
#satanicbesties
#squintiesforever
#nosnakes
#illmissyoutons
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#illmissYOUmore
#satanicbestiesforever
#creepsiesforever
#sataniclampalways
#crepes
#existentialpigs
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You need to be sure to send more pics!!! That way I’ll know you’re safe!!
#campsiesforever
#nofuckingsnakes
#satanicbestiesforever
#wolves
#ribsforever
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I definitely will if I have cell reception!
#nosnakesnosnakesnosnakes
#NOWOLVES
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I want to make sure you’re safe and sound!!!
#nofuckingsnakes
#nowolves
#nocentipedes
#imissyoualready
#frownyface
#satanicbestiesforever
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My sweet Sugar Pappy!!
Can’t believe that I nearly missed this post!!!
I am totes in. Going to start slaving away day and night for this!!
#boilermakers
Love,
Kidney
PS: The term in Afrikaans for hungover is Babbelas. So we will be babbelas!
:
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My sweet Kidney!!!
I have been waiting for you!!
#babbelasforever
Love,
Sugar Pappy Giuseppe!!
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Sigh. I failed so hard at this. Sorry, bud. 😦 But I’m excited to catch up on all this shitty goodness!!!
#xoxoxo
#shitfestforeva
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I know…….. I’ve missed you here….. : (
#itstillprobesforever
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It’s been one of those summers that just doesn’t let up, amigo.
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I understand : ((((((((((((
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