Hello!! You know, I wouldn’t say I was a connoisseur of “bear movies” – I think I’ve only ever seen THE EDGE (which I loved) – so I can’t say this is the best bear movie out there but it’s one of the best bear movies I’ve seen, Which, I suppose is TWO now, so I’ve liked them both. This one is definitely more horror than THE EDGE, including a handful of VERY gruesome parts and is actually believable. The acting is good, the blood effects were very good (and gnarly) and I really appreciated that they used a real bear and not some dude in a plastic bear suit. I’m not sure if the bear was actually ripping that poor actor to shreds but it was awful tense and butthole clinching. Lastly, how many times do you think it took me to spell “connoisseur” correctly? That’s almost as hard as trying to spell lieutenant or type the word Barbara.
The opening to this movie is fucking great. A good looking couple of people are going off on vacation. They get in the car and do some talking and then the dude plays this song on the car radio system and the chicks is all “NO! Not that fucking thing!!” and he’s singing the lyrics and right when the chorus comes around she starts dancing like a fucking hillbilly and they cut to the opening credits. I laughed a lot at that. There’s a lot of hiking and scenery and a little skinny dipping to be had for the next dozens of minutes until we’re introduced to an actor that I’m not very fond of:
Did you ever read THIS piece?? To quote my good friend Smash from the comments section of that review: “Eric Balfour is a real turd.” I can’t agree more with that and for some unknown fucking reason, he has a Scottish accent. Aside from him and his moustache being in this, this is pretty good. Luckily he’s not in it for very long and after we get rid of him we get:That bear goes around shitting all over the forest; this documentary proving that bears do, indeed, shit in the woods. That last sentence isn’t really true although I do suppose that bear had to shit at some point during his time on the set. I could also be gender stereotyping as that bear could very well be a female (I didn’t look between it’s legs because I am a gentleman). I would also like to add that the lead is very easy on the eyes:
and, because I am such a gentleman, I would never post internet images of her in various stages of undress.
*runs off down the hall*