Here’s an oldie that no one but Lem has ever looked at : )
After trolling around the 70’s and 80’s in the Netflix queue (there’s not much else), I found something more modern, the dud that is “The Resident”. I do remember this being advertised and then released but I don’t remember hearing about this breaking any box office records, and now I see why. Boring from start to finish, this really did nothing for me the entire time except make me wonder why the production company thought this would be a good movie to make. Maybe it went like this:
“Let’s make a movie with hot stuff Hillary Swank slinking around her apartment in her underwear.”
“Ok, sounds good”
“Let’s throw in a perverted and demented landlord who skulks around in cavernous tunnels behind the walls and spies on her taking baths and sleeping.”
“Wonderful. (hasn’t this get done to death?)”
“Add Jeffrey Dean Morgan?”
“Um, ok.”
“Let’s use some of that ‘Thriller’ budget.”
“Sure thing, boss.”
Well, this is not at all thrilling, Swank prancing about isn’t what you might expect, Morgan plays it off all right, but these situations they are in, really? Pass on this grass.
E.R. Nurse Swank is sad and lonely after breaking up with her cheating boyfriend, living in a motel, weeping. As luck would have it, a beautiful, redone, dirt cheap apartment opens up and the moony eyed, sweet, charming, owner / landlord Morgan accepts her in and gives her the keys without even a background check. Soon enough she is bathing and it is rubbing lotion on it’s skin and being spied on by a mysterious and lurking peeping tom. I wonder who it is. Oh wait, got that figured out from the commercials. No suspense there. Blah, blah charming Morgan shows up at an art show, shyly woos her, are they going to do it?? Oh no, she has a change of heart at the last second and tells him it’s not right. I bet he comes unglued now, right? Yup. The rest of the “stalking and spying” story plays out very slowly until we culminate to the slow ending and then a slow roll to the credits. Boresville.
Two top hats for: not being from the 80s, Hillary Swank, no CGI and not 3D.
Nice callback to lotion skin-rubbing. Another hat should be added for that.
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The other week I had a sunburn and It had to rub the lotion on It’s skin…..
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I think I’ll avoid this one, looks pretty shitty.
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That’s probably best, Boss.
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I trust your judgement Eric.
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Sweet!
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You have good judgement Eric.
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I liked this one actually. Found it was pretty suspenseful at times and one of Swank’s better pictures.
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Fair enough to me!
#fairenough
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I feel comfortable leaving this one on the shelf.
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I like that idea. We’ve done good work here today.
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Someone told me this was like “Sleep Tight”. I doubt it.
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Absolutely not…
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I’ve seen both and it seems a bit like a shitty US remake, but obviously nowhere near as good, and actually missing some of the key (and most terrible) parts from the Spanish film.
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I kinda loved the Spanish one
#justme
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It was good but god, it made me very uncomfortable. That’s actually a pretty big understatement. #ick
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I think I saw this on the Lifetime channel. It was awful… I must have been the only other person who ever saw this.
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I wonder if Swank is proud of this one?
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UMMM… NOPE ! lol
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LOL
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Sweet Pappy G
Sounds boringggg. Love Jeffrey Dean Morgan. He is most welcome to come stalk me
Love,
Kidney
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Sweetest Kidney,
It was totally boring. In fact, it was boring as shit!
Love,
Sugar Pappy Giuseppe!
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Hilary Swank’s career has really taken a downturn
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Right??
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But! But, but, I love Jeffrey Dean Morgan aka Papa Winchester on Supernatural. Sniff.😞
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I like him too, but not The Resident hahaha!
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Sigh. Thanks for the great review/warning. Taking this off my list.
#morehugs
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It’s pretty lame….
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Poor Eric!
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HA!! I watch these so you don’t have to : )
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You Rock!
#iappreciateyou
#raisinghell
#porties
#loveyou
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WOO HOP!!!
#porties
#raisinghell
#deadhooker
#lovekim !!!
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😙😙😙😙😙😙😙😙
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< 3
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Am I the only person who finds Swank, like, cute but not necessarily attractive?? Also I once read a Christian thriller that had this exact same plot (except the chick was married and there might have been a teen daughter but the “landlord being a creeper in the totally too awesome to be real apartment who then gets a little wacky!” part).
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I’ve always thought she was one of those people who are beautiful from one angle and not so much from another…
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Ooohhh, yeah. That’s a great way to put it…
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: ) : )
#totes
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Urgh… Hilary Swank.
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Ha ha!
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Is it just me who hears Hilary’s wank?
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Now I will forever….
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You’re wecome
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I might look this up one day when I have nothing else to do :].
I nominated you for a creative blogger award – http://drakulus.com/2015/09/03/my-first-creative-blogger-award/
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THANKS!
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Looks like a load of Swank.
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HAHA!!! It is!
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Did I say something like “boooooooooring” AND “#NOBOOBS” = pass on that grass (to quote the poet himself)
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Good call on this one!
#noboobs
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Hey! I missed this one. Hey! Guess what?? I’ve seen this! And, hey – guess what?? I agree that it’s total SHIT! 🙂
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We should buy lottery tickets!!!!
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I don’t have any money. Buy one then share the winnings with me!
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I don’t have any money either….
#bootsale
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Ha! Still need to do one of those!!!!
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Meh, seems you have had a slew of disappointing movies Chop!
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