For any of the six Good Beloved People who still read this site – you may recall that I built this place to talk about all of the shitty horror movies I watch – on purpose – so we can have a bunch of drinks and get our tits out and rail on super-shit movies without getting in trouble on our work servers. And – for anyone with some short term memory – I’ve been on a roll of seeing TERRIBLE FUCKING movies lately while I’m stuck up on an airplane, heading to and from smelly New Jersey. I still know how to keep things in perspective though, so when I tell you I quite liked this thing, it’s not just because I watched the awful Prom Ride and then this – so this was a refreshing slice of life that got me out of that goddamned limousine. I did like this! I might try to get into some of the details later but – you know what I liked most?? NOT a lot of shitty, useless, irritating dialogue! And, I doubt I’ll ever complain about Scodelario – not just because she’s good looking but that has to be one of the best last names ever.
In the opening scene we see Scodelario hanging with her boyfriend who’s smoking some weed. He then accidentally shoots her in the leg with his crossbow. Bam! I love you! Oops sorry! However many months trans-pass over the opening credits, she’s now knocked up but is skillfully able to climb walls and sneak into her boyfriend’s second story window. “I’m pregnant!” She says. “I have my whole life ahead of me!” Her boyfriend replies. Meanwhile, downstairs, his mom and dad are bound and taped up as some thugs intend to make off with the dad’s bank’s loot. “Please don’t do some raping!” Says the mom. (She doesn’t really say that but it’s intended))
Elsewhere, where I live, I just did my laundry and when I went to put the clothes in the dryer, I noticed that I just washed all of my clothes with the cat food bucket in there so now they are all covered and soaked with Meow Mix. Neat. I’m going to smell good when I wear those things to work. *Whistle Whistle*
So these guys break into the boyfriend’s family’s house and steal off with the dad. The main thug of the group gets hurt and spends a long time lying in the boyfriend’s bed with Scodelario hiding underneath it. That might sound kind of boring or lame but I thought the people who did this things actually pulled it off pretty well. Eventually she gets out from under the bed and some fun happens for the remainder of the run time. I’m not the kind of guy who gets into too many particulars of the movie but I thought this was enjoyable and it didn’t make me want to blow my brains out. Maybe these guys will read this and use that for the DVD:
“It didn’t make me want to blow my brains out.” Isaacs Picture Conclusions
I don’t think this is something I would watch over and over but I liked it enough. It was a TON better than the second movie I watched on the flight. That thing was called Bleed and it didn’t make much fucking sense. Kind of like the shit I write out here…. here’s the poster for Bleed and I swear that’s all you need to see about that fucker:
And, because I won’t ever review The Maze Runner (even though I liked it enough) here’s another picture of Scoledario talking about Bleed:
And, because I can only get to about 1 post a week these days and we need to get the most out of it, here’s a picture of my set up when I go out of town:
That’s my ipad, lip balm, fan and noise machine.
I guess that’s enough for me for one day! Hopefully I can get something else pulled together before too long.