In the anticipation of putting a new post out Friday – let’s revisit this fun little number (which has something to do with Friday’s potential post!) !
I wrote about this thing a LONG time ago – in 2011 to be exact – and exactly one person has ever looked at it – and it’s a LIKE so I’m not sure of the date – but I think it was very recently when someone and I were discussing a movie script so – I could reprint the thing here but I thought I would give it another go and see if I liked it as much as I did 3 and 1/2 fucking years ago and – I sure did – and here I come armed with my own ability to make screen shots! So – be careful and this is NSFW and I’ve had a couple cocktails so who knows if I’ll talk too much or make any sense and #boobs and I love this movie and I think everyone should watch it except for people who have sticks and other sundry items up their butts, like a half of a horseshoe or, perhaps, an apple slice or maybe even an apple cobbler, but this is good fun and a fun, fun example of indie horror filmmaking.
For any longer term reader out here, you’ll recall, fondly, that I am a huge fan of the TGOGTSBPOOBO sub-genre and this is all about it! This is not the type of movie that wants to include or exhibit Oscar caliber acting or weepy, cry inducing scenes of sheer brilliance that your heart will melt and you’ll be moved to rethink history or the war on terrorism or how some dude can’t talk in public – this movie is about: blood, skin and slasher-murder. It’s absolutely hilarious and I applaud the team that made it!
To open: this Spirit Camp girl ↓ sneaks away from a round of Campfire Stories and just wants to get laid:
Too bad though – Spirit Camp guy is more into other Spirit Camp guys so he rejects her pushy come-ons and splits to go join other Spirit Camp guys in card playing and pinochle and, likely,
butthole sex moonlight canoeing. Did I just come up with a new term for butthole sex?? Moonlight Canoeing??? I think i did and I like it!! Anyway, she puts her shirt back on and heads back to the campfire and SLASH!!!! She gets murdered in the woods!!! Blood squirts everywhere. Squirt squirt squirt.
Fast forward to a couple of years later and a girl is getting ready to go to Spirit Camp. Her boyfriend just wants to get laid one more time but she says no, but he is allowed to um – um….. er…….. have some cherry pie…..
Later, at Spirit Camp, the girls get a lecture from the camp counselor, and then the head cheerleader before they disperse to their bungalows to talk about sex and smoke weed.
Elsewhere, a cheerleader running late to the opening ceremony meets the killer FACE TO FACE!!!
Elsewhere, the groundskeeper who is always cutting wood and may or may not be the killer does some peeping. One of the things I loved about this is the constant “killing weapon in front of the moon technique”. SHRIEK!!! CHOP CHOP CHOP!! STAB STAB STAB STAB!
Oh, and I also loved: Soon we are down to the last three candidates for murder…
“I’ll swim across the lake because I’m the best swimmer! I’ll get the boys to help us!!” Someone says.
“The boys???” Someone replies. “They won’t be able to help us because they’re always Moonlight Canoeing!!!”
“I’ll try anyways!!!” She says and plops in the water.
Will she be eaten by the random alligator or sliced to death by the killer?? Who knows! Later, tied to a table and being given The Sex by a guy wearing this:
the blond from a few pics above pics her handcuffs with a bobby pin! STAB!! She stabs her assailant, removes his mask and runs off. “If you wanted to tie me up and fuck me, all you had to do was ask!!!” She screams, knowing his identity.
And there we go. I won’t spoil the end for you but this is really good fun for a guy like me. If you’re in the mood for something like BOYHOOD – this won’t be for you. If you’re in the mood for boobs, blood and body counts – this is all about it!