With a name like The Belko Experiment and a poster showing some dude with his arms in the air, this didn’t really draw my attention. It seemed to be some sort of stupid ‘lab experiment gone wrong’ piece of shit with CGI blood that we’ve all seen way too many times before. WAY TOO FUCKING MANY TIMES. But then I watched the trailer and I was all up in it. Who among you have worked in an office environment? I have for the last 20 years… the thing I have always worried about is: what would i do if someone came in shooting? How would I defend myself and others? I have some ink pens, some sticky notes, a mouse, a monitor, etc… this takes that kind of concept and asks: Who would you kill first if your own life was on the line?? I thought this was fucking great; funny, well made, practical effects, all that shit, until the final minute kind of petered out… but hey – you have to try and set up a sequel, right? Everything I write is a potential trilogy so… anyway – loved it!

As we open, a bunch of office people head in to work in some South American country ( I think it’s SA but it has been a few months since I watched this [twice]). They have on their neckties and their pant-suits and their knee-cut skirts. They settle in for some coffee and tea and bottled water, Monday morning talk and then all of the windows and doors are sealed shut, over the P.A. comes a message: “KiIll someone right now or you will be killed”. ( ! ) 

So people start doin’ some killin’.  I could go into the plot for several minutes but, really, who cares. It’s a survival game in the office space and it’s all sorts of fun. Where can you hide? Where can you fight? What can you use to defend yourself? This is written by the guy who did the Guardians of the Galaxy movies, the wonderful SUPER and – what was it – Slither? I didn’t really like Slither – but I don’t really care for Michael Rooker – i think he ruined it for me.. even though he’s in this one too….I really liked this movie. I’m not a guy who gets into the canon of movies, I’ve always just wrote about movies i’ve seen, good or bad or shit. If you remember, I hated The Godfather. I just want to be entertained for a few hours. I am NOT a film critic.