Isaacs Picture Conclusions

BRIGHTBURN (2019) THREE PIECES OF BROKEN LIGHTBULB IN YOUR EYE

Remember that mean, median, mode chart you studied in school that never had anything to do with anything in your life? That’s about how this goes. It starts off a little shaky, gets pretty good in the middle and then kind of shits its pants at the end. Do you know about this movie? I’m going to talk about the ending but it’s not some huge spoiler because this isn’t a mystery or some kitchy movie with a big twist, its “what if superman came to earth and was bad instead of good” movie. And R rated. And grisly. I mean, for real, I had to look away at one point. *references the title of this piece.This starts off a little clunky:Panning shout through the house showcasing lots of reproduction booksLovely couple trying to make un bebe petitA crash in the woods that no government agency in the world foresaw or investigatesShaky cam video of un bebe petit in various stages of being un bebe petitAdolescent bebe petit is now puberty age and discovers he is a different bebe petitAfter he figures out he has powers things start to get good. He also figures out he has – um – powers in his – um – Little Johnson and starts creep peeping on the super cute girl from his classroom, does a little killing and we get set up for the big finale. Also, what happens after the following screen grab was really amazing in a gruesome OMG what the fuck kind of way.Remember: spoilers. After he kills his dad he heads back for a reckoning. “He’s hunting for sport!” Screams no one. Anyway- the best part of the movie was the 15 or 20 minutes he spent terrorizing his mom and destroying his house. He’s here! He’s there! He’s blowing that guy to smithereens! There’s blood everywhere! Is the mom going to do him in with that metal from the spaceship???Remember spoilers: she doesn’t and then the movie is over with a half ass closing moment. And then, after the ending title card, there’s a scene that doesn’t fit and looks like it was only halfway produced. And it features Michael Scratchy Throat Rooker screaming. Overall I would say I liked it but it did have some down moments. These things are usually blamed on the studios so fuck you studio!

2 comments

  1. Yeah, this was a lot more gruesome than I was expecting. Don’t you find you get some really unforgettable gross out moments in otherwise forgettable movies these days? Brightburn being a good example. They deserve to be in a better movie.

    Liked by 1 person

    • theipc

      I completely agree. When that guys jaw plopped off, it blew my mind. It definitely deserved better than michael Rooker screaming about Fishman at the end!

      Like

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